Bum Gravy

#2
ARRSE Standard Post No. 1:

"Photos or it didn't happen".
 
K

Kirkz

Guest
#5
Depends if you live alone or not!
Mind you if you don't and you keep quiet you might end up doing :)
Following through is the sport of Kings you know :wink:
 
#6
Well, cannon fodder, you ain't going to hide it because mummy will notice when she goes to change the sheets on your bed.
 
#7
Last night I shit the bed... should I tell anyone or just keep quiet?
As I am in a humanitarian mood, WHAT made you do this deed? Over indulgence? A bad prawn?
Or, more than likely, you lazy bastard.
 
#8
was it YOUR bed?
If it wasnt, I'd keep schtum!!! If its your own, who gives a shit, apart from you obviously.
 

maguire

LE
Book Reviewer
#10
pffft...everyone's shat their own bed at some point.

it's only worth bragging about if you've shat someone else's.
 
#11
Meh...

Who hasn't? If you manage to knock over the bedside lamp with a well aimed spritz I'll be impressed, otherwise, meh....
 
#13
Shagged a bird in Chatham when I was fucking hammered I only went and swamped the fucking bed!
Woke up late for work as well so passed the buck and thinned out.
Thought it was funny until one of the blokes said "oh you shagged the riddler" bollocks!
Oh and to cover my lateness I just waited until naafi sneaked in put my covvies on and acted like I'd been there all morning so Mr Tipler just carried on as normal.
 
#14
did it have sweetcorn in , or did your boyfriend pick it out with his meatdagger first?
 
G

goatrutar

Guest
#15
After a bad vindaloo I arced up and shat the bed. Must've dozed off staright after as the first I knew about it was Mrs. Rutar belting shit out of me yelling "You dirty bastard, I just rolled over into that!"
 
#19
I live in the jewel of the North that is Redcar, and I tend to use old chip papers as bed sheets.


Sent from my iPad using ARRSE app 'cause I can.
 
#20
After a bad vindaloo I arced up and shat the bed. Must've dozed off staright after as the first I knew about it was Mrs. Rutar belting shit out of me yelling "You dirty bastard, I just rolled over into that!"
Hi goatie, great to see another pooh story. We need our own group...



One hot summer, I was watching TV in the nude. I was recovering from a mental hangover caused by cheap red wine and red hot chilli. I farted and sprayed shit all over the sofa.

Luckily it was not my sofa.
 

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