Broomstick-flying witches to be brought down in Swaziland

Discussion in 'Southern Africa' started by Tool, May 20, 2013.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Broomstick-flying witches to be brought down in Swaziland - Times LIVE

    For the hard-of-hearing:

    Witches flying broomsticks in Swaziland above 150 metres will be subject to arrest and a hefty fine of R500 000, civil aviation authorities said, according to a report.

    Witches’ broomsticks are considered similar to any heavier-than-air transportation device that is airborne, reports The Star.

    “A witch on a broomstick should not fly above the [150-metre] limit,” Civil Aviation Authority marketing and corporate affairs director Sabelo Dlamini told the newspaper.

    No penalties exist for witches flying below 150 metres.

    The report said it was hard to say how serious he was, but witchcraft isn’t a joking matter in Swaziland, where the people believe in it.
  2. Is this of the same ilk as the "Witchdoctor Stole My Penis" story which originated from that area a few years ago?

    If I recall correctly, the witchdoctor was gong to be sentenced to death but I'm still not sure if it was resolved by the police simply asking the complainant to drop his loin cloth.
  3. Which is one reason one can never take people of Africa seriously.
    • Like Like x 1
  4. Dunno, but during the first post-apartheid voting thingamabob, you had to present a fingerprint as proof. There were records of unscrupulous people using foreskin imprints instead...
  5. As the majority of African witches ride about on the backs of hyenas I really don't see the problem.
  6. Would those be flying hyenas or the regular kind?
  7. Schaden

    Schaden LE Book Reviewer

    Regular - flying hyenas would be ridiculous.
    • Like Like x 5
  8. Sort of flying pigs then
  9. I tell you - any Mzungu cared for in his/her early years by an African "nanny" has got some pretty fucked up ideas very deeply ingrained!
  10. I like Swaziland. I had a great shag in the Cuddle Puddle with an Afrikans doris. And another time I saw Dickie Henderson in cabaret at the Royal Swazi Spa Hotel.
  11. Schaden

    Schaden LE Book Reviewer

    Does your wife also complain about tokolosh bed elevations?
  12. Not as daft as it sounds when you think of kaffirs dying in their kaya (sp?) during the winter due to Carbon Monoxide poisoning from their heater.
  13. Schaden

    Schaden LE Book Reviewer