British Armys Worst Acronyms (BAWA)!

Are we really now in the realms of defining our future doctrine based on the ability of the title of the project/programme or study to form a clever acronym???

I've just spotted this in the June JHC Newsletter:

"Visual Ability & Manned Performance in Illumination Reduced Environments Guidance (VAMPIRE) . The conduct of war has
changed. Previously limited by daylight, around the clock preparation and actual combat is now the norm. Although our
technology can continue to operate in darkness and without “rest”, humans are less able to perform in reduced illumination and
sleep deprived environments. The guide has been designed to collate information on the major issues surrounding night
operations from various sources, and advises commanders and authorizing officers how to identify the hazard, and manage the
risk. "

Is this the same as...Fighting at Night? (FAN! )

Many more (real ones) I'm sure...!
Royal Navy rather than Army but Sub-Lieutenant Under Training or SLUTs!!!
Why call a truck a TCV troop carrying vechicle ? Its not like this term is ever applied to anything other than a 4 tonner in my experince .And when did
small arms become weapon systems is to try and make infantry seem clever ?
When conducting rehearsals of night operations during daylight, you are, in effect, conducting a Night Exercise Without Darkness, or a NEWD.

UN Cyprus have a Sector Civil Affairs Team WO, commonly known as the SCAT WO... Does this make him the SHIT Warrant Officer??

By the way how do I add a picture file??
There is a G1 application called AP3, used for tracking personnel in and out of operational theatres.

The AP stands for 'Andrew Paul' (not full name), the Desk Officer at the DEC named it after himself. Classic.
Having not worn the green for a while it may be that this job actually exists now but I remember when it was first mooted the name was found to be wanting.

Information Systems Manager or ISM.

No problems there but what about the Garrison ISM or even worse the Joint ISM team?

Are they out there somewhere under a different name??
We all know the term TEWT (Tactical Exercise Without Troops). I prefer the alternative: PENIS (Pointless Exercise Not Involving Soldiers).
What about Single Lads Action Group SLAG

or one for Chicksands

Conduct after Capture WO --- The CAC Sgt Major would you ever admit to being in that appointment???
and it's true... I used to work in the Policy and New Technology Section at Chertsey (PANTS), although they used P&NTS!!
Those delightful chaps at Royal Air Force Akrotiri have:

Flight Lieutenant Operations (FLOPS) and Squadron Leader Operations (SLOPS).

Is that an example of RAF humour or could they just not see that one coming?


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