British Army urban legends - like Stalwart to see footy

One tale that I always found difficult to believe was some guys pissed nicked a camel from a zoo somewhere around Hameln and put in 65 Sqn's bar for the OC's leaving bash.
 
That’s why the pilot who told the females coming back of tour that ‘they are all now ugly again’ must have been flying an aircraft the size of 20 Jumbo Jets carrying half the British Army
CAARPS - It did actually happen. Unfortunately for the pilot, sitting in the front row of his hairyplane was one of those women, who was also one of those Lt Colonels and to really ice the cake, one of those Commander Legals from 1(UK) Armd Div! Late 1996, flight from "Split Rear" to Brize I think...

Chuckling two rows behind her was a much younger Captain Cuddles RA.
 
How about the Teeny Weeny Airways pilot who used his Sioux Helicopter to carry out an illegal detention of a SOXMIS car and managed to stop the car on a narrow bridge by smashing its window with one of his skids as the Soviet occupants recorded everything on camera - caused one hell of a diplomatic incident, particulary as they managed to get a shot of his smiling mug as he put the skid through their window ! I can't remember the exact date but it must have been during the 70s.
 
CAARPS - It did actually happen. Unfortunately for the pilot, sitting in the front row of his hairyplane was one of those women, who was also one of those Lt Colonels and to really ice the cake, one of those Commander Legals from 1(UK) Armd Div! Late 1996, flight from "Split Rear" to Brize I think...

Chuckling two rows behind her was a much younger Captain Cuddles RA.
I am not saying it didn’t, read all of my post.

Just that I have heard it so many times now as a "True account" from so many different people relating to so many different flights that there must have been more people on the aircraft than there was kit on the Atlantic Conveyor or stores destroyed in the Bicester fire. :D:D
 
I am not saying it didn’t, read all of my post.

Just that I have heard it so many times now as a "True account" from so many different people relating to so many different flights that there must have been more people on the aircraft than there was kit on the Atlantic Conveyor or stores destroyed in the Bicester fire. :D:D
... or a witicism repeated by more than one pilot on more than one flight?
 
Gents must be honest I was broken hearted when some folks thought I wuz bull sh1ting about Bob Painter and the Stollie, but It was gospel and well 69 was way back.
However I must say that I do have trouble with
"How about the Teeny Weeny Airways pilot who used his Sioux Helicopter to carry out an illegal detention of a SOXMIS car and managed to stop the car on a narrow bridge by smashing its window with one of his skids as the Soviet occupants recorded everything on camera - caused one hell of a diplomatic incident, particulary as they managed to get a shot of his smiling mug as he put the skid through their window ! I can't remember the exact date but it must have been during the 70s."
Hope it's true and may I suggest that the question is asked on our Aviation Forum.

john
 
Gents must be honest I was broken hearted when some folks thought I wuz bull sh1ting about Bob Painter and the Stollie, but It was gospel and well 69 was way back.
However I must say that I do have trouble with
"How about the Teeny Weeny Airways pilot who used his Sioux Helicopter to carry out an illegal detention of a SOXMIS car and managed to stop the car on a narrow bridge by smashing its window with one of his skids as the Soviet occupants recorded everything on camera - caused one hell of a diplomatic incident, particulary as they managed to get a shot of his smiling mug as he put the skid through their window ! I can't remember the exact date but it must have been during the 70s."
Hope it's true and may I suggest that the question is asked on our Aviation Forum.

john
It was the early 70's,it wasn't on a bridge it was on a dual carriageway,it was an illegal detention of the Soxmis vehicle,the twat in the Sioux then compounded his actions by landing the Helo in front of the car,jacking it up to immobilise it,and then allowed the press to take numerous photographs of the scene!

When the BLO from Bunde arrived,he nearly congratulated the pilot by grabbing him by the throat,and managed to avoid an International Incident by assuring the Sovs that the pilot would be disciplined

The bottom line to this "incident" was,during the following 3 months,members of Brixmis ended up with some rather serious lumps,cuts,breaks,and bruises,in retaliation for an ignorant twat,who obviously never listened to his Soxmis briefing.
 
Appologies A et M it was Mercer Barracks...............Imphal was home to 5th Skins
I was at Mercer late 80's (1 RGJ) when someone drove a 432 into the CO's office late one night. The press were camped out at Rosies bar for about a week afterwards. I could have made a few quid with the photo's I took but wasn't suffficiently clued up to think of it at the time. Probably a good thing. I always thought that it was this incident which made the battalion first in line for the chop when Options for Cheapness came knocking. I remember the RSM ranting at the assembled troops on the square; he threatened 'I'll tek awa ya soomers' (he was a Geordie), which made us all laugh, later, obviously.
Ah happy days.
 
It was the early 70's,it wasn't on a bridge it was on a dual carriageway,it was an illegal detention of the Soxmis vehicle,the twat in the Sioux then compounded his actions by landing the Helo in front of the car,jacking it up to immobilise it,and then allowed the press to take numerous photographs of the scene!

When the BLO from Bunde arrived,he nearly congratulated the pilot by grabbing him by the throat,and managed to avoid an International Incident by assuring the Sovs that the pilot would be disciplined

The bottom line to this "incident" was,during the following 3 months,members of Brixmis ended up with some rather serious lumps,cuts,breaks,and bruises,in retaliation for an ignorant twat,who obviously never listened to his Soxmis briefing.
Thanks for the clarification Roof Rat

All I could remember, and its over 30 years at least since the incident, was some part of the story from an old and bold WO2 who had done a tour at BRIXMIS before I met him and the grainy B&W slides that were used and then discarded to the back of slide boxes in the early SOXMIS lectures, but certainly remember the retaliatory actions. I do remember the shooting of Major Nicholson from the American Mission. by a Sov. Were you on the Desk at the time ?
 
One Incident I do remember fairly clearly though involved an RPC Chunky from the Defence Platoon in Lurgan 74/75. When he was do a spell in Nick he was asked if he wanted anything to read and asked for a Training Manual for a Saracen as he wanted to learn how to drive when he got out. Then one night on Guard at the Knicker Factory (Kitchen Hill), he got a mate to open the back gate onto Union Street and drove out in one of the Cans parked in the yard. He managed to find his way somehow to Portadown, although he'd never been there before, and even stopped to pick up a UDR foot patrol and drop them off back at Mahon Road before asking directions back to Lurgan. It was the first time he'd driven a Sarrycan ! I believe the next time he was in nick he expressed an interest to learn how to fly !
 
Thanks for the clarification Roof Rat

All I could remember, and its over 30 years at least since the incident, was some part of the story from an old and bold WO2 who had done a tour at BRIXMIS before I met him and the grainy B&W slides that were used and then discarded to the back of slide boxes in the early SOXMIS lectures, but certainly remember the retaliatory actions. I do remember the shooting of Major Nicholson from the American Mission. by a Sov. Were you on the Desk at the time ?
I did 2 tours with the Mission,74-76,and 79-82,so I just missed the end of the retaliation for that particular detention,but saw some of the scars etc.

What most troops in BAOR didn't realise was,for every frivolous detention that occured in the FRG,the favour was returned in spades,to the Mission,whose area it had occured in. If it was a fair cop guv,then there wasn't a problem.

The Nicholson shooting occured in 85,whilst shootings occured during my time,this was tragic,and along with the murder of Adj Chef Phillipe Mariotti (French Mission) in March 1984, proves the lengths that the Sovs,and the Stasi would go to,with intimidation of the Allied Missions working in the DDR,there were teams of Soviet,and East German SF,deployed throughout the DDR,whose sole job was to catch the Missions doing something "naughty",not nice people.
 

BritSol

Swinger
I was at Mercer late 80's (1 RGJ) when someone drove a 432 into the CO's office late one night. The press were camped out at Rosies bar for about a week afterwards. I could have made a few quid with the photo's I took but wasn't suffficiently clued up to think of it at the time. Probably a good thing. I always thought that it was this incident which made the battalion first in line for the chop when Options for Cheapness came knocking. I remember the RSM ranting at the assembled troops on the square; he threatened 'I'll tek awa ya soomers' (he was a Geordie), which made us all laugh, later, obviously.
Ah happy days.
I was posted to 4RTR LAD (Imphal Barracks) in late February 1989, and that incident had happened about 6 weeks before.
 
I was posted to 4RTR LAD (Imphal Barracks) in late February 1989, and that incident had happened about 6 weeks before.
I drove past the incident on the way to a signals exercise, the bonk was still wedged in the wall, story was it was stopped by the safe in the CO's office. RGJ guy with us said the CO was well hated. Support Coy were the suspects....except they were out on exercise.
 
Seems stealing stuff that goes clank clank is a common occurrence I knew a lad in my unit who was and ex field engineer before transferring to postie trade who showed us were he'd stolen a 432 from the camp the FPO was on in Hamelin to go down town he did a bit of time in collie for it his time frame would have been mid 80's i'd imagine
 

jimti

Crow
Apologies for resurrecting a long dormant post but I've recently come across something that may shed light on the 'myth'

Markintime,
You may have heard the story from many sources but that doesn't mean that the original is not true- I've heard the 'soldiers pitchforking the NI farmer' in various guises and involving various units but it certainly stemmed from an actual incident.

As for 'reading it in the press' well many people did just that, especially Times readers

Regarding border controls, certainly at the time of the event, border controls were quite informal, especially with military vehicles moving between units in Germany and the Low Countries.

But now for the 'myth';
The following account of the event occured in an account of a Court Martial appearing in The Times of 24th November 1965.
Anyone with access to The Times archives will easily verify this.
Very interesting, according to Wikipedia the Stalwart didn't enter service in the Army until 1966
Alvis Stalwart (FV620) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
 

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