Brecon SCBC - funny stories

Discussion in 'Infantry' started by Brew_Time, Nov 20, 2006.

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  1. Anyone got any funny or memorial stories from Brecon. I'm sure there is.

    BT
     
  2. it was the first place i ever heard the expression "son, your admin is in bits!" how i larfed and larfed.

    and another time a lance-jack (former co's dvr) who had done well in A wing at colly, and was sent there to cement all of his new-found knowledge, was rtu'd after about a week with the explanation "suggest this man does an nco's cadre first". how did the pre-course people miss it? he came back and stopped in the pl as a lcpl tho' (recce)
     
  3. We had a Czech officer attached to us, When we were on the fibua phase, after spending all fcukin day puting in def stores, the DS who were already p****d off with us after overhearing a few lads moanig about their teaching skills, Decided to put said Czech in Appointment just as last light approached, And with the whole Village stood too he walked into the middle of the village blew his whistle in his best fa cup final ref impression, then screamed at the top of his voice "PLLAAAATTTOOOOOON STAAANND TOOOOOOO" . oh how we laughed untill my DS came in and said "if you don't tell that mainiac to shut the fcuk im gona rag you all nite and the next" you 've never seen so many cream crakerd blokes sprint so fast towards the poor fella!

    What was even better was when he did exactly the same at first light, after we had told him too lol.

    The only other funny's are all the norm, blokes snoring in ambush's having ND's etc

    what wasn't funny was after taking a postion i decided that johnny gurka's gpmg was better than my rifle, so i dumped my pw and in a moment of madness i picked up the gmpy by the barrell, well as you can imagine not very funny to me but at least i made the DS and the rest of the section laugh, then had to spend the rest of the week on ex with a hand like ray clemence!!
     
  4. That sounds like the giz i no u ginger nutter
     
  5. Some "older" D and Ds may remember Kev Parsons from the 70s. Kev was renown to have blown his instructor out of a tree. Aparrantly they didn't get on and on one of Kev's Battle Exercises (BEs) he told his instructor because of the nature of the exercise to sit in a particular tree, which the instructor did. Kev had wrapped cordex around it and cammed it, at the end of the ex - boom - one tree missing from the landscape with instructor too. He did, however, get an A for the BE.

    BT. :D :D
     
  6. Blokes on thier hands and knees in the river on one of the ranges looking for a grenade someone droped.
     
  7. On one occasion a wessex helicopter mistook a signal to 'f*** off!' for 'come & get me!' when a demolition charge (blowing blind ord) put several cwt of rubble through its rotorblades. On another a bloke was felled by a pigs willy when a charge was detonated in a bag of offal from the local knackers yard:)
     
  8. My instructor, a guy from 2 Para called Rooster (nick name) was rumoured to be able to pick up a 6ft table with his teeth. Although I'd not witnessed him doing it - it was always a talking point.

    BT
     
  9. I heard a story off one of my mates that when he was down on Juniors his platoon was getting a kit inspection on the square by the DSM. One 22 lads rations were all sorts of sweets and biscuits in a plastic bag. The DSM went off it saying " what kind of fish and chip regiment are you from?" The lad replied 22 and the look on the DSMs face was apparently a picture. He just turned away and walked onto the next lad. Classic
     
  10. Prob 22 Cheshire's.

    BT
     
  11. On the 2 miler any sort of way of "going light" was a challenge. The kit check and weigh-in was always entertaining to see who was going to get caught. A number of the guys had bought kids plastic bino's and completely wrapped them with face veil to hide the plastic. On the instructors words - BINO'S - the said squaddie would open his smock to reveal a neatly wrapped pair of very light plastic bino's. Boots NI were also good for tabbing in. Some even tried to construct lightweight helmets complete with proper chinstrap. Yes, SCBC was a challenge - to some.

    BT
     
  12. The best cover from view and in coming fire is the stream you are Patrolling next to so get in it.......Still to this day cannot figure it out (DS Twats)......
     
  13. I know one lad who took the lead inserts out of his bandolier, and put biscuits brown in them instead, all went ok till the DS asked everyone to hold their bandoliers up in the air and it being a windy day {with rain} said bandolier was blowing all over the place, He got the 94 for the rest of the week.

    i know a few who beat out the concrete insert's out of the 94's aswell they never got caught though jammy fcukers. :)
     
  14. ugly

    ugly LE Moderator

    I was pissed of at dim yorkshire lad who as duty sect cdr insisted we weighed our webbing with the DS before bombing up. I stood on the end of my roll pin belt and the higher the ds lifted my light webbing the heavier the spring balance looked. I was lightly bolloxed for carrying too much wt!
     
  15. I attended juniors in 1993 were i remember a rather large DSM (Paras) when i mean large i dont mean fat,
    After a weekend at home i came back late on sunday night as i entered the accom i noticed a perfect circle in one of the windows were something had gone through, all the way down the corridor were burn marks as if some thing had been fired (wait for it) and then at the end of the corridor next to a door there was rather large burn mark in the floor, next morning large DSM gets us on parade and asks "who fired the schermuly in the block over the weekend" bare in mind out of 120 pax on the course only 5 pax remained due to them either being scottish or gurka one of the pax just happened to have burn marks on his finger tips and when some one looked at his shoes in his room he had melted soles, anyway no one owned up to it, DSM says i want a name (hello burnt fingers and melted shoes would have given it away to me) that night DSM had 120 us stood to attention outside his office on the road until some one owned up, the guilty person had been spoken to by some bigger blokes but still refused to admit it, by the morning something had been said to DSM and the matter was dealt with. Moral of the story book out for the weekend and still be blanket punished on the monday evening.