Bored and got the house to myself . . . what to do?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by thrombo, Apr 20, 2008.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. I have the house to myself and I am bored sh!tless. What shall I do?
  2. thats all I got!
  3. wnk yourself stupid fcuk the dog cat hamster goldfish what ever you can find.
  4. Dodgy porn film- video chatroom on , av a w&nk, pub for a few beers, back to watchersweb chatroom - chinky takeaway perfect! :D
  5. Ring an escort agency up and get one of their best pro's out, do the business , then lock her in your shed / cellar or gimp hole and take out as necessary, and finally when she starts to smell, chop her up with an axe and spread her around your garden......that should keep you busy for the day
  6. Hoover whilst dressed in the missus clothes singing I want to break free!
  7. cheers computer fcuked coffee all over the place LMAO.
  8. This and.... Don't forget to give the milk man a blow job.
  9. Shove a feather duster up your arrse and mince around the house naked dusting as you go.

    * I have never done this myself though*
  10. Puff :D

  11. "Available in all good stores now, The JML ARRSE Wipe"
  12. Crap all over the house and blame it on the dog.
  13. I agree with the sentiments of most of the other arrsers...

    Masturbate furiously.

    F_G (Bonnet)
  14. You have to ask?! 8O It's the perfect oppertunity to finally get rid of Maddie's corpse! :twisted:

    Always assuming there's a farm with some pigs within easy travelling distance... :wink:
  15. Sh!t, I've been rumbled. How did you know it was me!?