Bordons a fantastic place if your perm staff, nice countryside, lots of takeaways, close to London. If your a trainee then things are cushty, most of the powers that be are so scared that you might report them for something that they pretty much leave you alone.
Basic - Day one - so you're a Fatbadge/Wedgehead, get on guard (summer 89).
Darkskinned Provo Sgt who told me not to nick the batteries out of the radios!!!!???
Crash outs and only allowing the Marines to carry live ammo after a Tiffy had fired a live round through C Coy Accom doing a mexican unload in the block!!
Being warned for orders along with 89 other Cfn for forgetting to"Sign for my duty" every four days.
Being one of 119 members of night guard (I sh1t you not). was about 90 cfn on a night (only 95 in A coy) in 1988 (WO1 senior taking parades)
Recy Mechs bouncing the Country Club, only to be seduced by Suzie Wong and Granny Green Teeth and the Grizzled Twins from hell.
The Screaming Skull doing dry skiing around camp. RSM Mac ' sane bloke'
"Guarding" the quarters with a Pick Elf - thank FCUK PIRA never visited How safe you felt wading into p*ssed up CNUTs at the snooker hall when on IRF,QRF or RRFBFT - E and F sheds,, PTI only - E Sheds..bargain!
The lovely and delicious "Pat"
Dont you mean Warty, Aids ridden Pat?
Class one - to follow
1979 great place to learn the cons, must have a life outside and not take Army too seriously. eg volunteer to clean out coy office on manpower pool so card can be removed for CSM duty roster, remember the card system chaps?
What a fcuking place with the live sex shows on thursday in Martenique NAAFI
1982 bit harder to con, RSM on the ball as were CSMs but still have a life outside, London etc just make sure your pal is taking the roll call and has a good excuse for absence.
1985, bit more wedge as a fs but still got away for evenings and weekends RSM back to throbber mode with CSM to match. Dead easy to con.
1987-88 Fcukin shiite, Work, work, more work, more responsability to coy HQ, lowest in the mess, no time to go to London at night, working most weekends all concessions to pads (not unusual there) RSM throbber CO throbber CSM throbber bad vibes altogether.
92-93 here"s your room Mr *********, great to see you again and to think I remember you 12 years ago.
Bordon was one of the places hard to avoid, all that had to be done was to find a way to work around the petty approach of the PS (many of whom did not want to be there) It was in a shiite location but probably had everything a born again REME soldier wanted. I was not that soldier.
Ahhh Bordon - a brief history from the battsimm pespective:
1986 - shithole, hated it.
1992 - shithole, hated it. (But, there are girls here now so its looking up...)
1993 - shithole, hated it. (The girls have made it even worse!)
1995-97 - shithole, hated it.
2000 - shithole, hated it, things are in different places, I'm confused help me.
2003 - shithole, hated it.
Not been back since.
Loved the pig-pen though, but hey, who wouldn't. Shame the Queens went down the hole after Big Paddy sold up to little Paddy - always had good times in there, always. I still have yet to find out why I got battered at the kebab van at the fire-station junction (Old-timers only for that one), one night, still bugs me even now after what, 21 years?
Strange place, Bordon and the ultimate example of the REME/Horse shi'ite analogy..........