At last - its been a long time coming, but here it is a Glaswegian version of Bohemian Rhapsody enjoy !!! must be read to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody! Is this the real life? Or is it the methodone? Stuck in the Gorbals, two bob fur the telephone? Open yer wine, an' talk wi' a whine........like meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Um just a weeji, Gie us yer Sunny D Cos I'll chib yer pal, Rip yer da, Slash yer dug, skelp yer ma! Any way the Clyde flows, disnae really matter tae me.....tae me. Haw maw, just chibbed some bam Buckie bottle tae the heid Noo the doozie eejits deid! Haw maw, um just oan parole An noo I'm headin back tae Barlineeeee...... Haw Maw.......oohooh ooh Never meant tae steal yer purse But if I'm no fu' o' smack this time the morra' Carry oot, carry oot! An we'll go oot on the batter! Too late...the bailiff's here Sends shivers doon ma spine Gubbed 10 jellies just in time Goodbye all ma muckers, I've got tae go Got to go and rip some tosser fae the scheme Haw Maw.......oohooh oooh I'm a jakey bam, I sometimes think I've never been washed at all I see a little silhouetto of a bam Adidas! Adidas! Can ye get us some Kappa? Thunderbird, White Lightning, Very very Frightening, me! Twenty Mayfair? (Twenty Mayfair!) Twenty Mayfair? (Twenty Mayfair and some skins!) Magnifico oh oh oh oh! I'm just a fat boy, nae body loves me He's just a fat boy fae a fat family! Spare us a pound for a wee cup o' tea? Get tae feck, skanky slob, will ye get a job? For fecksake.........NO I will not get a job Get a job! For fecksake........ NO I will not get a job Get a job........willnae get a job Get a job........willnae get a job no no no no no.... Oh gonorrheoea! Gonnorrhoea! Gonnorhoea and the clap! Then doon the pub, has the barman put aside For me? For me, For meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! So you hink ye can slash me an poke oot ma eye? So ye hink ye can chib me an leave me tae die? Haw bawbag! Can't dae this tae me bawbag! Just wait till I'm oot Just wait till I'm right oot ma nut!! Feck all really matters, anyone can see Feck all really matters..... Feck all really matters..... Tae meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.........eeeeeeeeee.........eeeee eeeee!!!