Body Fluids and Effluent - Alternative Uses

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Lumber_Jack, Mar 23, 2007.

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  1. OK. So everyone has heard the old adage concerning urine and softening new boot leather. My question is whether there are any additional uses for what one might normally flush away, spray into a hidden sock or kleenex, or spit onto the pavement. Be as creative as you like - i am convinced the human body is a huge resoure.
  2. You can drink it. Apparently. Wee that is.
  3. I've never felt the need to waste money on Prit Stik when there is a ready supply of organic, environmentally-friendly, 'green' glue up my hooter. And also in my c0ck, although it requires more effort to get out and is for some reason frowned on in the office.
  4. I understand the latest craze sweeping the states is to use Bull semen as hair conditioner. (Serious)

    If there are any ladies want to utilise a far cheaper alternative, just give me a PM and I'll see what I can knock up.
  5. Surely your manfat is more valuable than for use as a mere hair product? Aren't there small tribes in the Amazon that worship your spunk? (or is it just mine?)
  6. If you are short of egg cups I can recommend a neatly coiled turd. The bast*rd thing won't roll away then will it!
  7. My manfat is extremely valuable old boy... the f*cking CSA certainly think so!!

  8. Harp lager drinkers can confirm this.
  9. I would crawl naked over razor wire for a taste of Kylies p*ss.
  10. Madonna drinks her own piss apparently, supposed to be good for you!!

    wonder if she would let me take a dump on her fat face the ugly moose!!
  11. You silver tongued b*stard geo.
  12. Cad old chap, you seem to be possessed with a supernatural ability to read my mind. Or just possessed!

    I would however crawl naked over razor wire, for its own strangely attractive properties. I've been told to avoid emotional entanglements though!
  13. I like to stick the occasional strand up my bottom..

    ... have me met in a former life?
  14. I'm not sure if she's into freckles.
  15. From a medical perspective there's nothing wrong with drinking IN MODERATION a small, dilute amount of your own urine.