Bloke food

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Pete_the_writer, Nov 14, 2007.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Years ago (I think) there was a TV programme (series?) about some of the things blokes cooked at home. I don't have a TV and never saw it, but read a few things about the series in the paper.
    It reminded me of the days (30 years ago) when I was in Elizabeth Barracks, Minden. It was the first time I'd ever been stationed in a block where singlies had their own cooking facilities! I used to buy stuff from the NAAFI pads shop and heat them up in my mess tin(s) if I felt hungry when I got back to camp. (Because I'd run out of beer tokens and couldn't afford the schnell imbiss.) I still do it.
    My favourite 'recipe' is as follows:

    1 x tin Stewed Steak
    1 x tin Minced Meat
    Spices, various
    Rice, slack handful

    Method:
    Fill kettle, switch on, boil water
    Empty tins into microwaveable bowl, add spices (whatever) and put lid on.
    Put rice into similar microwaveable large bowl.
    When water boiled, tip into rice bowl so water covers rice.
    Nuke in microwave for 11 minutes on medium
    When cooked, take out of microwave and leave to stand in the hot (boiling) water.
    Place meat dish in microwave.
    Nuke in 5 minute segments (stirring each time) until hot.
    When meat is hot, take out of microwave.
    Empty water from rice.
    Put some rice (all of it?) on plate.
    Cover with meat (to taste).

    What do you cook when you get home and can't afford the schnelli? In other words, what's your favourite 'bloke food' recipe?
     
  2. Fried baked beans and rice ... with pepper sauce , tastes very nice
     
  3. See Egg Banjo thread!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


    Eggs Cost Fuck All

    Bread Even Cheaper


    Bit of Oil


    Frying pan and heat source


    Now come on, the simplest Bloke food ever, possibly the cheapest and makes you fart like a motherfarcker just to pi5s the girls off even more, (in so much they never left you supper ready to ping cook)

    :D
     
  4. :whew: bombay bad boy best grub ever
     
  5. Bloke food eh? What about bar snacks? Surely the humble crisp is the staple diet of many a man.
     
  6. Meat. Large slabs of meat, grilled to within an inch of their lives.

    With ketchup.
     
  7. Whatever is in the fridge on the George foreman. Failing that pot noodle.
     
  8. Pot noodle - the slag of snags (they banned that advert...)

    Choice of champions especially Bombay Bad Boy!!
     
  9. slag of snags??

    l cant spell!!

    delete: snag

    insert: snacks
     
  10. Has everyone forgotten the humble meat pie??
     
  11. What about those Rollover hot dogs the Colonel Gadaffi sell?
     
  12. I can black-cat all of them!

    I blew up the microwave at HMS Cambridge in '94 due to a slight misunderstanding of cooking instructions for a can of Stella. No new microwave was forthcoming for a while so I invented the messdeck barbecue. Quite simple really, buy a nato standard Ginsters pastie,whack the pusser's radiator on max chat then ram said pastie in between the facets. lo and behold...in around 3hrs time you had a lukewarm pastie or had fucked of down town already for a pint because the excitement of forthcoming Hors d'oeurves was just too much!

    (No Ipods in those days...yakunts) :wink:
     
  13. Lincolnshire or Cumberland sausages fried, then cut down the middle and placed between thick slices of buttered bread with fried onions, mustard and ketchup.
    Usually I'll wash it down with one more ice cold beer straight from the fridge. If it's already becoming daylight outside I'll make a big mug of hot sweet tea, strong with loads of milk. Then have a last scotch as a nightcap.

    Bas!ard I'm hungry and salivating now....
     
  14. Take .....

    1 Iceberg lettuce
    One loaf of bread
    2 fistfuls of stuff you may find in a salad - onions - pickled onions - spring onions etc.
    and/or Salad cream.

    Method.

    Cut loaf in half and gouge out centre of each half - (TIP - keep the bits you gouge out - the wife can use them for stuffing if you don't tread on them)

    Line each loaf cavity with butter or stuff you can't believe is not

    Cut lettuce in half - discard outer leaves until you get to the nice juicy heart - tear that up and stuff inside loaf halves.

    Add other salad ingrediments - and/or salad cream.

    Gnaw into the barsteward.
     
  15. Deep fried chips and whatever meat you have covered in this sauce (like the TGI Fridays Jack Daniels stuff).