Blind jOKES

Discussion in 'The ARRSE Hole' started by ragyman, Jan 22, 2005.

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  1. Blind guy walks into a shop and picks up his dog and starts swinging it around his head.

    Shop Assistant: Excuse me sir can you stop that some customers are getting upset.

    Blind Guy: But i'm having a look around!
     
  2. That joke was around when Pontious was still doing aircrew selection :!:
     
  3. A homeless guy walks into the pub, and there are three other guys sitting there and they feel sorry for him. so they all buy him a drink each. Afterwards he comes over to say thanks

    he touches the first on on the sholder.
    man 1: thats great my arthritus has disappeared.
    He touches the second on the knee.
    man 2: you are amazing my rheumatisum has got.

    goes to touch the third guys eyes.
    man 3: Ho! who do you think you are touching i have been waiting 6 months for my Disabled Living Alowance. and there isnt any thing wrong with being blind when it pays £250 a month.
     
  4. What's small and brown and bump's into thing's :?:

    Jordan's baby :!:


    bit racist i know,still funny though :D
     
  5. J_D

    J_D LE

    don't know any blind jokes but I got this one:

    Irishman, Englishman and a German are caught in Saudi Arabia drinking. "Under Saudi law you are sentenced to 30 lashes then deported. Before you begin you are entitled to something on you back, what would you like?" said the prison guard to the Englishman just before lashing him. The English man, being a bit of a cricket fan, asked for linseed oil. When they lashed him on a post and let him go to catch his flight back to London he groaned and crawled to the airport. Next came the German. "Under Saudi law you are sentenced to 30 lashes then deported. Before you begin you are entitled to something on you back, what would you like?" said the prison guard "Nothing" said the German and, after receiving his lashes spat on the ground, called the prison guards Schisers and started off towards the airport. The guards then came to the Irishman. "Under Saudi law you are sentenced to 30 lashes then deported. Before you begin you are entitled to something on you back, what would you like?" "Oh", replied the Irishman, "I'll take the German".
    Ok sorry I know its not related to the thread but i thouhgt it was funny!
     
  6. Why doesn't David Blunktwatt parachute?

    His dog's afraid of heights...

    (gah, awful, I know, but I wish Blind Pugh would take a running one....)
     
  7. Giz - a bit??? But :lol: :lol: :lol:
     
  8. Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new piano??




    Neither has he....... :oops:
     
  9. J_D

    J_D LE

    have you seen stevie wonder's wife?
    (no)
    He hasn't either!!!

    Yeah yeah i know its poor
     
  10. shocking repeat of joke above anya.

    Hear about the blind castrator?

    He got the sack.

    :oops: