Black merc hits tree and loses

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by No_Duff, Feb 28, 2010.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. On the way to Bisley yesterday, road conditions were bad and it was p*ssing down a Black Merc sports went skitting by at about 90mph, I thought, w*nker, then about half a mile further on there was the Merc piled into a tree, it had hit some standing water shot over the central reservation, across the oncoming carriageway and into a tree, luckily there were no other cars involved.

    Bet the driver, if still alive never does that again.

    Tree One, Merc Nil.
  2. :D Princess Di walt!
  3. Marc Bolan walt.

    And yes I know it was a Mini.
  4. Trees are poor losers. I've tried it and came second.
  5. Hadn't thought she might have been in the car, I might have stopped if she was.
  6. Half a mile at 90mph is about 20 secs. I presume you stopped to render assistance, dialled 999?
  7. No thought of helping? Calling the emergency services? You're one hell of a citizen, aren't you?
  8. Is that also the number for the tree surgeon?
  9. Feckn hermer! :p
  10. If ironically, the driver was a tree-hugger, would it be classed as attempted rape with a sex-toy?
  11. Yeah, because tree huggers all drive Mercs

    Actually a fair few of them probably do.
  12. What type of tree was it?

    Good old sturdy oak is my guess!
  13. Many moons ago on my way from home in York to work at Dishforth, some clown went hammering past me on the back-road to Boro'bridge. Spotted him a couple of minutes later, standing in the middle of a field next to his pride and joy, now inverted and somewhat modified.

    Being a good bloke I stopped, ascertained he wasn't about to cark-it, and, having yelled "WANKER" at him, drove off. I hope his CoC understood why he was late on parade that morning.
  14. No, none of those thoughts at all, I'd travelled over 250 miles, got up at dark o'clock and wasn't going to f*ck my day up at Bisley for some tosser who thinks it's OK to drive like a c*nt. :evil:
  15. Which would make you c*nt :D