Bjork

Discussion in 'Films, Music and All Things Artsy' started by crabtastic, Jun 23, 2007.

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  1. Am back in Blighty for a few weeks and, having returned from the pub, I've been watching the coverage from Glastonbury and I'm puzzled. Although I'm a music fan, I have a little bit of difficulty in understanding why someone would pay £130 to chance the vagaries of the British summer which will pretty much guarantee that they'll be living like a Kosovar refugee for 3 days, but without the benefit of free food and drinking water being handed out.

    But that's an aside. You see, I'm an educated man, my mum says I'm brighter than average and I like to think of myself as fairly well cultured- that is to say that I'd appreciate it a lot more if Katherine Jenkins left opera to opera singers, took off the ball gown and just showed us her insides. What truly mystifies me is how Bjork can continue to have a career as a singer?

    Consider the evidence:
    - She's clearly as mad as a bicycle.
    - She's not even remotely good looking
    - She has no sense of rhythm
    - (Most importantly) She sounds like a deaf person trying to sing whale songs.

    Seriously, who the fcuk buys her music and who the fcuk listens to it? Is the sole reason for her continued ability to pollute the airwaves that she's a member of that club of uber-cool musicians that people pretend to like but don't really? (Beck, White Stripes, "World" Music artistes, 99% of any act even remotely connected to Andy Kershaw and the late John Peel etc.)

    Would it be wrong to wish for a resumption of the Cod War, just so we can get a couple of kicks in on Iceland for spawning this horrible fcuking creature?
     
  2. You're right.She's Sh1t
     
  3. If we're going to discuss pointless music acts then surely we can't leave out the following.

    Babyshambles or to be more precise, Pete Doherty (his dad who I believe is an LE Major must be so proud....)

    Amy Winehouse

    At least you're guaranteed that Bjork would be a good shag and it would be a good dit as well...
     
  4. "Bjork is clearly as mad as a bicycle and sounds like a deaf person trying to sing whale songs."
    I agree to the above.

    That's what she does, either live with it or change channel dude ;) .
     
  5. Well, I'm prepared for incoming, but there's much of her stuff that I love: Bachelorette is incredibly powerful, All is full of Love and the album Homogenic in general is cracking, as is Vespertine. I grant that Oh So Quiet is fcuking annoying, but in general she's an original, gifted musician with a cracking pair of lungs.

    *toddles off to put Bachelorette on*
     
  6. I think she's alright as well.

    I liked the vid where she was rolling about on the back of a flatbed whilst been driven round London or somewhere.

    It's your personal taste I guess. Somebody might read this and think I don't have any. So feckin what, it's your problem.

    Assume I have a bucket of water; look at the water level. Now put your hand in and see how it goes up? Right, well now take your hand out again. See how it returned to it's original position? Exactly. Now go and get your own bucket and leave my fecker alone.
     

  7. Big Time Sensuality - think it was New York

    and yes I would :wink:
     
  8. spike7451

    spike7451 RIP

    I quite likw Bjork & I'll even admit to having one of her albums.Think she was better when with the sugarcubes tho.
    Ant to follow on from Matelot's what's the name of that fecking annoying ex-army occifer type 'singer' who swamped the charts not to long ago,the name escapes me.
     
  9. Doesn't this thread belong in another - Women you fancy who you shouldn't!

    Weird isn't it... she's nuts, wails like a banshee, a butt ugger... but fits into that dungeon fantasy somewhere.

    Oh and spike... James Blunt... who disappeared from the charts more mysteriously than Slade or Rick Astley. Don't knock him, my daughter (nearly 3) only sings one english song from start to finish - 3 wise men - so we think he's alright.
     
  10. Bjork is a babe! She has a hell of a voice, but I'll admit the last two albums were, erm, weird. But I would, in a heartbeat. Felt that way ever since I saw her perform 'Birthday' on the TV (back before some of you were born!).
     
  11. Having been born on the same day as her ( but not year) I have frequently been accused of the following

    -She has no sense of rhythm
    - (Most importantly) She sounds like a deaf person trying to sing whale songs

    and also of dancing like a

    - thunder bird
    - frog in blender

    so maybe it's a scorpian thing?
     
  12. Like her or not, the world would be a more boring place without mentalists like her.
     
  13. i bought the birthday 12", and agree with greenslime, it's an eye of the beholder thing.

    best of sugarcubes is a great album, if you veer away from bon jovi and bubblegum pop there is other music and variety out there.

    if there are any smiths or johnny marr fans give modest mouse's latest album a listen, not left the cd player after a month now, awesome.

    I actually went to iceland because she came from there, a quick stalk you understand, but bjork has had the mother of all stalkers who blew his head off...google it, he was a nutter, a bit like the colonel out of apocalype now in the end.
     
  14. Shes well fit!!!
     
  15. Amy Winehouse is ace.