Birds

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous Jokes' started by Padrat, Feb 11, 2012.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Winter is here & our native birds will soon be finding food scarce. Please go to the pet shop & buy a bag of nuts for our feathered friends. There is no finer sight on a winter's morning than a pair of tits around your nut sack. But just remember it's a bit early in the year to expect a swallow!
     
    • Like Like x 3
  2. I hope for summat a little different this year, maybe a Nuthatch, ive seen em in the forest but not my garden.
     
  3. I know bird watching has it knockers but one of my friends is an avid twitcher. You should have heard him the other day - "Whoar. Look at that pair of tits.". He ejaculated.
     
  4. I certainly will not, it saves money on feeding the dog.
     
  5. My wife said to me "I fancy getting a boob job, what do you think?? I answered just rub some toilet paper up and down your clevage for a few months.. she said will it work? Well just look at what its done for your arse!!!
     
  6. In other news, the Kaiser signed the Armistice.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  7. The only way to attract a Great Tit is to look like there is a serious alimony in the birdbox.