Bird GAY Ness

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by jk22, Jan 22, 2010.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. If you best mate keeps letting you down on nights out because hes cuddling his missus at home (when hes agreed to come out, but let you down an hour before you meet, and you ve had to find out yourself) what do you do?

    My best mate did this several times, so I just fuked him off and told him hes a boring cnut and we havent spoke in 2 months! Safe to say we aint friends anymore. Principle.

    Anyone done this themselves?
  2. Quite simple. Don't blame your mate for you being a sad loner bastard. Mission accomplished. :p
  3. When a man loves a woman
    Can't keep his mind on nothing else
    He'll trade the world
    For the good thing he's found
    If she's bad he can't see it
    She can do no wrong
    Turn his back on his best friend
    If he put her down

    When a man loves a woman
    Spend his very last dime
    Tryin' to hold on to what he needs
    He'd give up all his comfort
    Sleep out in the rain
    If she said that's the way it ought to be

    Well, this man loves a woman
    I gave you everything I had
    Tryin' to hold on to your precious love
    Baby, please don't treat me bad

    When a man loves a woman
    Down deep in his soul
    She can bring him such misery
    If she plays him for a fool
    He's the last one to know
    Lovin' eyes can't ever see

    When a man loves a woman
    He can do no wrong
    He can never own some other girl
    Yes when a man loves a woman
    I know exactly how he feels
    'Cause baby, baby, baby, you're my world

    Oldest thing in the world, cuntstruck mate ditches his mates for a witch.
  4. Hilarious keep em coming.

    Hes a cock spaniel anyway. The shit he does for her! I was once like that. Mugs game.
  5. Get your own back on him.
    Drag him down to the pub then get a few of your mates to keep him entertained while you nip back and bang his missus.
  6. Dont fancy her at all. His last missus got it from me
  7. bad drills from a weak man.

    what price a phonecall or text.

    I smell a snaggy bird behind all this, some tears perhaps a tummy ache, "no no you go out I'll be alright snivel"

    snakes with t!ts + weak bloke = sh!t wingman

    No doubt he'll be all over you like a rash when she fecks off to a spa for the weekend with her mum

    Or snivelling like his bird when she dissappears over the horizon with "John from the office" because he earns more than him and listens to her properly

    hateful C.U.N.T.S birds
  8. Hes already tried and just said this to him, "no offence but I can't be round people who let me down, and for some reason I feel bad. I warned you a long time ago about taking the piss, so when this bird shags someone else, you ll have to go and grovel to some poor bloke lying in the street."

    and yes shes a bitch. Doesn't like me because I was bragging about how many i ve shagged, and she suspects I could lead him to cheating.
  9. If it's all done and you told him to feck off, why are you crying about it now 2 months later? Looks to me like she's more of a man than you 8O
  10. just want some banter, and the cock will call as hes been texting me etc and I'm still fecking him off. Best Mate for 10 years. Sold out!
  11. Read the fucker the riot act, twat him a few times and be done. Every silly bastard has been there at one point.
  12. I'm thinking that real mates wouldnt do that to their best mate. So fecked him off!

    He once tried to set me up with her best mate. Obviously I was game for it, but she looked like she had fallen out the ugly tree and been hit by every branch on the way down, and then raped by the ugly elephant at the bottom, after landing on her face.

    And I dont trun down most :twisted:

  13. What? the clap? Is it him that you fancy? come on, be honest, you just can't bear sharing him can you. :omg: :p
  14. Stop fecking whineing you soft cnut!!! You've done the hard bit fu(king off the loser. Now grow some and go out and find a drinking buddy who's already been down that road and damn well won't let you down on a promised night out unless he's diffi a lung or a couple of limbs :)
  15. Na, he's just being a silly bastard puppy. Happens to even the closest of mates. Some random bint is always a threat. Everything you've said points to it. Give him a slap, tell him he's a twat and remind him he needs to stop compromising for the silly cow as while you'll still be there she'll feck off in a heartbeat.