BIG KNOCKERS and their effects on morale.

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error_unknown

Guest
#1
In light of some of the earache that women posting on this forum have come in for recently, i'd like to lend my verbal support to their outstanding contribution to my spiritual well being.

I don't do an interesting job. They pay me a decent chunk of cash to plan microwave links. It's dull but it means I can have a house bigger than my Apprentice College bedspace. I came in this morning after a nice weekend, feeling sh*te at the prospect of another weeks work with no sports afternoon to break it up.

Fortunately, one of the girls who works here decided to come in, in a Bruce Willis/Die Hard type vest this morning. She has BIG KNOCKERS and i've spent the last three hours blimping them over the top of my PC. She's nearly caught me a couple of times but i've managed to look at the false ceiling just in time. They've helped me get through the day. The only thing that could make me happier, is if she goes out for a smoke. It's a bit chilly and I could be in for some chapel hat peg action when she comes back.

So heres to women, and particularly their BIG KNOCKERS. I salute you both.
 
#2
Try this Convoy: Turn your trousers inside out. Locate pockets, and cut the bottom off each one. Turn your trousers back to normal. Now, when you�re in the office, you can walk around with your hands in your pockets, and have a letch and a squeeze/tug/stroke at the same time. I do it all the time, but I think some of the ladies are on to me cos I walk around permanently crossed eyed with a sweaty forehead and tongue hanging out.......
 
#3
Follow her into the ladies, crack her on the bonce with a plank, look at her threppenies and her knickers then crack on working.

result, you have seen her norks and strides, without having to be nice or risk getting caught letching.
 
A

Argus

Guest
#4
Gunny......your solution can be improved upon.
Er........a good friend of mine, I'll call him marigold - who was a serial self-frottager really pissed his missus off by wearing out the pockets in all his strides with his constant covert fumbling. She thought she'd get him back by cutting off all his pockets and sewing in rubber gloves. He was well made up. She didnt take into account the fact that the big knobbly bits on the fingers doubled......no, trebled his fumbling pleasure, so Im told.
 
#5
Outstanding

I just asked Mrs MDN to sew some marigolds into the hole were mu pockets once were.... she said 'No you perverted pig'

I'll be back online when I have kicked her in the clack for insolence

Can I say that without being banned :D :D
 
#7
Ma_Sonic said:
Tried it today.....got caught! Got a smile though.....dirty cow..........lovely!!
Was that a vertical smile?
 
E

error_unknown

Guest
#8
My luck has improved. It's now only one day to the weekend, and this morning I was treated to some five star blimpage, courtesy of the vest wearing maiden.

Working in conjunction with a colleague, I got her to explain a spreadsheet problem to me. This needed her to lean over, exposing her BIG KNOCKERS for my colleague to observe unimpeded. After five minutes, she then moved on to him to solve the same problem, allowing me uninterrupted views of her cleavage/bra cups/and top half of both knockers.

I believe I have collected enough research data for my next thrap. By the end of lunchtime, my willy will be as ragged as a bookies biro.

Once more i'd like to salute women and their BIG KNOCKERS

PS Women with small knockers. You do have a positive effect on morale but it reduces in direct proportion with your bra size.
 
#9
Currently stuck in classrooms, being lectured by crusty LE's. My requests are thus:

Any chance of a web cam/photo link to said boobage.

Any tips for gaining 'over the shoulder boulder holder' face action from the librarian when I go researching "Implications of desert warfare on REME"

Finally, my own variation on the marigold trick... soldier '95 contact gloves, not as cold in these autumn/winter months and free replacement when you wear them out.
 
A

Argus

Guest
#10
Convoy.
great description : I could almost have been there - its logged, clocked and catalogued in the w**k bank.......Whats her arse like? Perhaps strategically turning a couple of desks before inviting her to inspect the next difficult spreadsheet........?
 
#11
Convoy_Cock said:
allowing me uninterrupted views of her cleavage/bra cups/and top half of both knockers.
C_C You must pursue your quest for the Holy Grail of down the cleavage glances - a glimpse of the pink nose of those puppies
 
#13
C-C, ref. the small boobies, don't forget, what you can't get in your mouth/hand/both hands is wasted! :wink:
 
#15
I was disappointed that there was no Monday update on the office chest this week C-C?

Please send sitrep - and if nowt happened just make it it up for the troops
 
E

error_unknown

Guest
#16
Fair enough Blackhand

As it happened she wasn't in yesterday, but on Friday she came in with them both practically hanging out of a shirt with the top two buttons undone. Whilst she was restocking the stationery cupboard I employed the subtle ruse of examining some 1:50,000 maps that are on a table nearby. As she went to place some Post its on the bottom shelf, I was treated to a full on ogle. Her bra was a little bit more brief that day, allowing a tantalising glimpse of the top semi-circle of nip.

I had to walk back to me desk holding one of the maps to conceal an obvious pan-handle.

I presume that her day off was used to decide on her outfits for the rest of the week.

Either that or to report me to the police for being a dirty little man.
 
X

XXXJake

Guest
#17
I go to the V.A. hospital to see different doctors there, and I always stop in to see a nice woman there who always wears low cut tops no matter what the weather is outside. They have to at least DD's on her, and in the summer when she is outside down the street from where I live, she doesn't wear a bra. Owww!
 
X

XXXJake

Guest
#19
BlackHand said:
XXXJake said:
I go to the V.A. hospital
P Wing or the Clap Clinic???
Sorry, they don't have either one there anymore. It's a Veterans' Hospital, but they have just about everything else. I just got veneers put on my teeth for free, and a lot of dental work done for free, had a cyst removed from the back of my neck about 3 months ago for free......you get all this for free when your a 100% disabled veteran, service connected.

(Good one about the clap clinic though. LOL)
 
#20
XXXJake said:
I just got veneers put on my teeth for free
Nice .....nothing like a gobfull of Oak paneling. George Washington had wooden teeth as well didn't he ?

XXXJake said:
had a cyst removed from the back of my neck about 3 months ago for free
I am sorry to have to break this to you like this XXXJake but it was not actually a cyst - it was your brain


XXXJake said:
.....you get all this for free when your a 100% disabled veteran, service connected.
I will grant to one thing XXXJake, you get looked after better than we do. I want wooden teeth and my brain removed without having to join the bottom of a waiting list as long as the Great Wall of China and for free as well.
 

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