best way to protect myself?

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by nodigitsever, Aug 13, 2007.

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  1. as three of my neighbours were recently smashed on the head from behind and robbed

    I am now slightly worried about the same thing happening to me when venturing outside!

    any Legal ideas Please?
  2. Where do you live?

  3. All of your posts seem to have the same theme, and I for one am getting rather bored with them. Perhaps you could spice them up a bit, like this:

    "as three of my Eastern European hookers were recently smashed on the head with large inflatable penii before being rogered within an inch of their lives by a masked man dressed as Santa Claus.

    I am now slightly worried about the same thing happening to me when venturing outside!

    any Legal ideas Please"
  4. always use a comdon!!
  5. USE THE fORCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  6. Do unto them before they do unto you
  7. Shave all your hair off, have a face tattooed on the back of your suede, wear your clothes back to front and walk around backwards. Then you should be able to see them coming.
  8. Wear a rubber gimp suit at all times, then wander around squirting skooshy cream on passers-by at random while saying "MMMMUUUUMMMMMMYYYYYY!!!" in low threatening tones.

    It won't keep you safe, but it'll pass the time
  9. My bold - if the protagonists maintain this modus operandi then some sort of helmet might be useful. Mayhap you could invest in a suit of armour and a steed:


    If you venture forth dressed thusly then you should be impervious to attack (unless the ruffians switch to using pikes, longbows or musketry).
  10. You could always hire a local thug to be your minder.
    Or just become a ninja and stalk the streets looking for the mugger, once you have found him you can kill him slowly with a spoon.


    Start a vigilanti gang
  11. Issued kevlar may be of use, especially if the attacker is an ex full screw gone rogue with a g10 shovel.
  12. Strap a claymore on your head.
  13. Mr Happy

    Mr Happy LE Moderator

    Be aware. Getting thumped from behind smacks of civvie victim mentality.

    If you think you're going to get hit from behind, turn around (fight) or run away (flight).

    Listen for the footfalls. Most muggers are kids or in their 20's and smackheads. Potential victims getting taken down from behind sound like the wkrs are looking for easy victims, face to face ain't so easy.

    You might also like to remember to carry a 2xAA torch with you when you are out at night, it can come in useful.
  14. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    When in Rome, do as the Romans do!

    If you can't beat them, join them!

    You getting the idea? Sign up to assist them in the mugging process. Much rather inside the tent p!ssing out, than outside, p!ssing in eh?

    Just a thought, and you could even get yourself some much needed wedge!
  15. Mr Happy

    Mr Happy LE Moderator