Best way of transporting shiny boots.

Discussion in 'Weapons, Equipment & Rations' started by Wee_Jock_Poopong, Aug 12, 2010.

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  1. Just after a bit of advice as I need to catch a plane to a wedding with the ginger fighting suit and my nice shiny boots, and was wondering the best way to stop said boots getting too damaged on the way.

    Thanks in advance,

    Wee Jock.
  2. mattyw

    mattyw Old-Salt Reviewer

    Tights usaly stop dust from building up but if you rap each of them in a plaastic bag it should stop dammage. use both as it usal works for me.
  3. Wrapped in Chinchillas.
  4. Toe cap wise, an old sock stretched over the toe cap does fine. Anymore than that, wrap in and old t-shirt.

    Tights are a bit thin and plastic bags will scratch the surface.
  5. I used to transport my Boots Shiney in a cotton travel bag, each times one, then into the case/travel bag and a quick 2 minute going over on arrival
  6. Individually in tights to maintain shininess and then socks, green, woolly for protection from knocks.
  7. In a shoebox padded out with tissue.
  8. Buy a shiney boot box from the shiney boot box shop.

    You clown.
  9. In a blur, all the way to the guardroom, then five times around camp once more in a blur with a shiny hand polished WOMBAT drill round held above your head and your webbing filled with sand.....
  10. Get the shoe box inside a loose sleeping back and put in a rucksack, shoe'd make it virtually baggage handler proof.
  11. Military hats always come in a hat box. Handily, a pair of Boots, Gleaming will fit snuggly into the now redundant hat box. The stores bloke will be glad to be rid of at least one of the hat boxes.
  12. Mine were usually transported attached to my size 14 plates of meat. They usually started at 120 paces to the minute but generally gathered speed as my destination became confirmed as the Guardroom.

    Seriuosly though. You could buy another seat on the plane, wrap your boots in copious amounts of cotton wool and let them travel in luxury. Be sure to take care when fastening their seatbelt. ;-)
  13. Or save all this body hair you keep removing from 6'.8" blokes and pack them in that.
  14. Step 1. Locate a fat American due to join your flight (Follow the smell of sweat and fried chicken)
    Step 2. Follow said Fat American in line and start to complain that the man obviously needs two seats and that you refuse to believe it's fair for him to only have to pay for one seat. Fat American will thereby be obliged to buy two seats conveniently next to yous.
    Step 3. Lure fat American into a secluded space using Subways Meatball Marina sauce smeared on a Big Mac Meal in a bucket of KFC wings.
    Step 4. Dispatch Fat American by jiggling him causing his heart rate to increase, leading to unconsciousness, vomiting or death.
    Step 5. Remove tickets, place shiny boots on seat, put feet up on spare seat and relax knowing that nobody (worthwhile) had to suffer for it.
  15. I prefer a Sheer 10 Denier stocking deftly slid over the end of each toecap. This will avoid difficult chaffing from a heavier denier opaque material. I, like Johnboyzzz, like to use a cotton covering. My favourite is the Nakeds Hiphugger Range by Victoria's Secret™ Size 10 (about £23 for a 3 pack). I then like to secure them together in a bag. The one I find best is the Louis Vuitton Jorn Man-Bag. Both boots fit in well (BCH that is) and I picked one up from their website for £940. Bargain!!