Best thrap off day ??

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Busta-Gut, Nov 4, 2007.

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  1. Wifey and daughter work on Sundays so basically it's an all day thrap job with a few breaks in between.

    What's the best day for you guys??

    In fact wha'ts the BEST crack one off story you've got ??
  2. Eeeeeeyes LEFT :slow: - errr nope no oxygen thief tag, must all be still at church then.
  3. Sundays. The day your wife and daughter come round to mine, strip naked and get on all fours in front of me pulling their labia wide open. I normally only last a stroke or two.
  4. sunday afternoons (I get sloppy seconds)*

    *your bird doesn't like anal but your daughters hoop is as loose as they come
  5. Funny you should say that. Sunday is best for me. There's a new act in the Reperbahn w4nk booths ... a mother and daughter combo ... with an alsatian.
  6. Every day.

    Mind you, there was a little challenge at ADU Sennelager to see who could bang the most out in a 12hr night duty.

    Poor old Jock F*******n (RIP Jock) allegedley managed eleven.

    And only stopped at that because of the abrasions.
  7. Away from home for six week stints, longer. Thank Fcuk for tinterweb porn.
  8. sundays are great!!

    mum comes round on sundays and helps me with my daily thrap,i tell ya theres nothing like a home thrapped c*ck,just the way mummy thraps it!!

    she such a pro!she even licks the residue off her fingers and out from under her nails!

    oh i lurrrrrrrve sundays.

    dad used to help out,but he got knobbed off seeing the wanton lust in my mums eyes and watching her dribbling with glee at the explosive reaction of my meaty treat!
  9. They are going to be home in 10 mins, so thanks for looking after them chaps. They must be cold hanging on the street corner for 8 hours so the least I can do is make a brew for them before I take their money and F off down to the pub. I just hope some of you fcukers have put a smile on the wifes face at least.
  10. I attempted the fabled 3/10 challenge whilst on leave recently, I damn near killed my self, failed as well;

    1st one was easy I was done in 36 seconds
    2nd one not so easy and towards the end hurt a bit but still in with a shot in a time of 6 min 22 seconds
    3rd one - disaster! arm was really sore and at the 10 min stage I had lost interest and changed from the fashion channel to how do they do that on discovery!

    have any of you hand to gland jousting champions ever pulled it off( 3/10 challenge that is)?

  11. From the world sex records.Not sponsored by Guinness.

    1) The most ejaculatory orgasms ever recorded in 1 hour for a man is 16.
    2) The farthest a woman has been recorded to ejaculate is about 9?29? (3 m).
    3) The greatest distance attained for a jet of semen that has ever been recorded is 18?9? (5.71 m) which was achieved with a “substantial” amount of seminal fluid by Horst Schultz.
    4) The average speed of a man’s ejaculation is 28 miles (45.05 km) per hour. The average speed of a city bus is 25 miles (40.22 km) per hour.
    5) Having swallowed the most amount of semen ever officially recorded Michelle Monaghan had 1.7 pints (0.96 liter) of semen pumped out of her stomach in Los Angeles in July 1991.
    6) The female gangbang world record is owned by a woman named Houston who had intercourse with 620 men in one day! A video was made of this historic event. As it took about 10 hours (with a few very brief breaks) to do it, the average time of intercourse was less than 58 seconds.

    7) Women hold the record for having the most orgasms. The biggest amount of orgasms enjoyed by a woman in 1 hour ever recorded is a pussy shattering 134!
    The male gangbang world record goes to porn actor Jon Dough who worked himself over 55 women in one day. He had 5 to 6 ejaculations. Actually, he was supposed to have had intercourse with at least 101 women, but he did the other 46 two weeks later.
    9) The record of the man who has had intercourse the most frequently goes to a man who was recorded to have had intercourse about 52,000 times over a period of 30 years. This means he had intercourse on average 33.3 times a week!
    10) Youngest Father - Sean Stewart, of Sharnbrook, England, became the father of a healthy 6 lb. baby boy on January 20, 1998, at age 12

    So England are world champions at one thing then.Bloody chav!
  12. I remember that well, as I went to Sharnbrook Upper School. It was a running joke there that all the female students got pregnant. There was even a creche built at the school (although some of the teachers with young children used it too).

    IIRC my mum registered the birth too. The bird that spread the flaps for him was 15 and he was 11. 8O
  13. There's nothing like the older woman to gain experience :wink:
  14. HOLY FUCK. Did this bitch nosh off the entire population of LA in one sitting??!!
  15. She gave fantastic head did Michelle. When I shot my bolt it was like I'd squirted a litre of range glue.