Best one liners - Best retort - Best put down on Arrse

#1
There is some real acerbic wit on here and this gives rise to me chuckling away to myself whilst on shift.

Can we have your quotes of the best replies on Arrse?

Here are two of my current favourites.

spaz said:
therealbigdizzle said:
FiveAlpha said:
therealbigdizzle said:
Seeing that I just found out where the fcuker lives, going to drop him a short, polite e-mail and kindly request that he sends some products or some money to you guys...
Why would you do that? Does he owe you money or items? Does teaching uniformed youths watered down soldiering skills automatically make you a bailiff? Or are you bigging yourself up for the sake of a few military groupies who buy cheap hat-wrappers off an internet no-mark?
neither... just like to see justice done.
Are you some sort of internet based superhero?





Juan_Ramirez_III said:
6517johnson said:
Does Anybody know how to apply for a service wedding and what i need to do?
Why would you want to? If people want to see 15 stone of fat c*nt stuffed into a brown suit and stood next to Bella Emberg they can go to a TA medal parade....
 
#3
Unfortunately, you do indeed appear to have no discernible leadership qualities. Furthermore, you seem to be overly cautious, timid and lacking in self confidence.
A career in the military may not be for you.
Have you thought about the RAF?
Cait I believe...
 
#5
Markintime said:
Robert_Da_Hero said:
Nice topic Sunday, you would of done better including some of my classics to be honest.
Surely that would be a sundae?

Sickly sweet, bad for you and with crushed nuts.
hmmm now your talking.

Anyway im off some of us still have to try and make ourselfs look presentable in the morning.
 
#6
Robert_Da_Hero said:
Markintime said:
Robert_Da_Hero said:
Nice topic Sunday, you would of done better including some of my classics to be honest.
Surely that would be a sundae?

Sickly sweet, bad for you and with crushed nuts.
hmmm now your talking.

Anyway im off some of us still have to try and make ourselfs look presentable in the morning.
You should have said that yesterday.
 

Joker62

ADC
Book Reviewer
#7
Robert_Da_Hero said:
Markintime said:
Robert_Da_Hero said:
Nice topic Sunday, you would of done better including some of my classics to be honest.
Surely that would be a sundae?

Sickly sweet, bad for you and with crushed nuts.
hmmm now your talking.

Anyway im off some of us still have to try and make ourselfs look presentable in the morning.
Are you sure that overnight is going to be long enough?
 
#8
This one from ravers a while back had me laughing my head off

MDN his due he has had to deal with a whole heap of sh1t due to this creature and how the hell he managed to bite his tongue with an inconsolable, sobbing girl like me crying down the phone at him I don’t know,

Ravers
Does anyone else have an image of MDN breathing heavily while wearing stockings and suspenders and an S10, slowly masturbating as he listens to this girl crying down the phone?
 

Legs

ADC
Book Reviewer
#12
Outstanding said:
I will not give my Opinion. Opinions are like arsseholes, everyone has one.
You clearly are a man of a thousand arsseholes then...
 

B_AND_T

MIA
Book Reviewer
#14
deepsahoy said:
Watching this thread is like being bukkake'd with stupid.
One of the best I have seen for a while.
 
#16
You couldn't get a clue during the clue mating season in a field full of horny clues if you smeared your body with clue musk and did the clue mating dance.
No idea who or where but makes me smile.
 
#19
I remember someone once described me as more of a cnut than Cnuty McCnut of Cnuts Lane, Cnutsworth, Cnutingtonshire. I thought that was rather good tho I was a bit worried about persec if he knows my address.
 

Similar threads

Latest Threads