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Best food parcel?

I'm about to send off a food/goody parcel to my brother-in-law out in the sun and sand. It was easier sending parcels out to my husband as he'd tell me exactly what he wanted. 8O

What are the best and worst things you've received?
Sandpit Mk1- a well malleted fruit cake and 6 tubes of toothpaste from a WI in surrey.

Sandpit MK1- a plastic bottle full of brandy, pity it was an old shampoo bottle. Grown men cried that day.
Mag_to_grid said:
Worst = A creme egg easter egg on telic 1
Best = A massive selection of top trumps that the makers sent us after a begging letter
Yes an old dear sent my husband an Easter egg! Mindyou I bet it was still eaten.

As for Baldrick's Bullet, my brother-in-law is in the armed forces 'over the pond'... not sure whether it would go down as well with him???
Always been cake, for me. Large chunks of rich stodgy fruit cake. Nothing like it with a cuppa to make you think, "Home". Bit of a bugger to get there in one piece, I'll admit.

2nd choice would be fresh ground coffee, but nowadays the Snowdrops will tear the packet apart thinking it's a drugs shipment.

M&S tinned ham or chicken went down well, as did mackerel fillets in tomato sauce AND they're easy to ship.

Ingredients are another welcome one. A few herbs and spices in film tubs relieve the monotony of compo, or even just a decent curry powder.

Basically, anything the recipient likes at home that can be safely posted.
Fortnum's afternoon tea hamper dispatched to HQ 1(UK) Armd Div at BLMF for Cuddles by a lady friend. The look on John McColl's (then COS) face as the postie dropped off the wicker hamper at the G3 desk was worth every penny!

Sadly F&M are not allowed to send alcohol to BFPOs but the whisky marmalade and strawberry and champagne preserve were nice gestures.
I do believe I had the best ever one!

3 tinnes of lager ( the small ones shaped like tins of pop)
2-3 feet of bubble wrap
2 * chemical ice packs
2 packs of crisp

1 set of written instructions (cos he knows im dim). Place ice packs inbetween tins and wrap the whole thing in bubble wrap place back in the box it came in, i forgot to mention the box it came in. wait 20 min then hey presto....cold booze.

I was with the Yanks at the time and the booze was a verboten, quality!
got sent a jiffy bag with some old maccy d's wrappers after the lads had been for a big mac meal, thought they would send me the wrappers to show me what i was missing bless them! :roll:

I usually send mates parcels with a useful items that they need, but i go round asda or tescos and get some proper pap to help fill the box up and make them wonder what the fook is going on when they open the parcel and get a 3-5 year old toy and some other useless stuff like an egg cup and birthday cake candles etc. food dye is a good one as with the sealed mugs everyone drinks out of these days it easy to slip it in, then watch people walking round with a blue or green mouth going about usual daily stuff, wondering why the O.C was looking at them funny etc.
When I was at BAS, I couldn't get my hands on cheese and onion crisps for love nor money, so a few packs of them raised morale for a whole day.

Shame they got battered so much on the journey, but 10,000 bits of crisp is better than none.
Top tip: be very, very careful with anything liquid, sticky, messy, juicy etc. If it bursts open, not only will it arrive in a mess, it will likely ruin just about everything else in the mail bag with it, including everyone elses mail. Pack this type of thing very carefully in waterproof bags and padding (assume that it will break) or better still, send something else less risky.


Book Reviewer
Does anyone still do those bloody massive fruit cakes with big cherries in them than reeked of rum and were..miracle of miracles...actually in a large round tin?
Schaden said:
Does anyone still do those bloody massive fruit cakes with big cherries in them than reeked of rum and were..miracle of miracles...actually in a large round tin?
You'd be lucky to get one of those bad boys in under the 2KG limit.
Telic 1 - been on ORPs for weeks, parcels were a godsend. Hence excitement at the arrival of a fair-sized one from ex-airborne uncle. Opened to discover the following contents:

1 * tin cat food
1 * bacon and beans
plus loads of loads of bubble wrap

Oh how the blokes laughed.....
My dad sent me Cheese and Wine...result some fat loggie tosser bust the box and the bottles.......

If they had found The Whiskey...would have been well pissed off :wink:
when my bezzer was doing basic many moons ago I sent him packets of crackers in the post. The thought of him having to scran them all infront of his corporal still makes me laugh now. Getting kicked in the balls first time he got leave wasn't quite as fun though...

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