Best excuse ever!!!

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by fltpilot, Jul 25, 2013.

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  1. You could not make it up & it's on the BBC!!!!

    A man caught with a prostitute in his car told police she was there to show him where to buy tomatoes.
    West Midlands Police said officers found the woman sitting inside Muhammad Ikhlaq's car while he withdrew £20 from a cash machine, which he said was to pay for tomatoes!!!

    More @ BBC News - Tomato excuse for prostitute in car in Dudley
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  2. I got caught looking for hookers in Soho once. Staggering about blind drunk and all of a sudden, a spotlight was shone on me.

    'Oy, wot you doing?' Cried Old Bill.

    'Just standing here. Standing is not a crime'

    'Well, we fink you are lookin for toms'

    'Well, I suggest you prove it, now piss off'

    And that was my only run in with vice squad.
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  3. Living in a civilised country as I do, you can actually ask the cops for directions to the nearest knocking shop.
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  4. Living in South Wales, as I do, there is no requirement for prostitutes.

    Fucking slaaaaaaagggssssss.
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  5. surely it's a crap excuse as he was still found guilty, the best excuse would have been one that got him off.
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  6. FOC
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  7. Perhaps he misunderstood the term "tom"?
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  8. TheresaMay

    TheresaMay LE Moderator DirtyBAT

    Now, Errol - what have I told you before about thinking? I do however agree; it was possibly one of the worst excuses ever.

    I'm guessing the law would eventually 'ketchup' with him in the end.

    Shame he didn't get the fine 'squashed'.

    How credible the story is though? That would depend on the Beeb and their usual 'sauce'.

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  9. Ha ha ha Fuck me a wooly mammal sexual reference in association with someone from Wales, how original and extremely funny, I desperately hope it catches on........
  10. Well I am glad you liked it.

    In fact I am quite surprised you understood it.
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  11. Didn't she get him off or was he interrupted?
  12. And yet they've got no idea where to go to buy tomatoes.
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  13. How fucking expensive are tomatoes in Birmingham?
  14. I wonder what he was getting for £20.

    I could probably do with some of that.
  15. Probably a kicking off the toms pimp!