Best bang since the big one

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by BONNACON, Jun 10, 2011.

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  1. Last few weeks we have had threads mentioning blowing up cows in Thailand, Sea slug missiles and home made pyrotecnics. What have Arrsers actually blown up (usual rules apply) preferably with hillarious results but bragging rights acceptable. Love a big bang me.
     
  2. when a younger version of my current form, used weedkiller and sugar to blow up a rabbit hole, nothing that funny but a fucking big bang. Used to use bangers to blow up a variety of reptiles and small rodents.
     
  3. I did not tell you this, and will refuse any knowledge of my advice.

    1:- Glow plug
    2:- Latex glove
    3:- Oxygen
    4:- Acetylene
    5:- 100s of metres of speaker wire
    6:- Car battery

    Assembled as per obvious. Retire to safe distance. Ignite.

    Job done
     
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  4. maguire

    maguire LE Book Reviewer

    I blew up a rubber johnny once in the student union bar.
     
  5. The last thing I blew up had a realistic mouth and anus.
     
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  6. Erm bit weak.. Balloons.....
     
  7. Weed killer and sugar in a lead pipe suspended over a tin of lit meths in the middle of a cornfield.
    Result? A God-awful bang, a perfect crop circle about 100 yds in diameter, and a field fire.
    Causing: the arrival of two fire engines, a police car, about 200 spectators who'd heard the bang and a reporter and photographer from the Luton News.
    Front page headlines in the next edition asked, 'Was the explosion and fire the result of a meteor?'.
    How we laughed!
     
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  8. Or:
    1. A splash of petrol in a jerry can.
    2. A light bulb with the glass removed to reveal the element glued into the lid of the jerry can.
    3. 100s of metres of speaker wire.
    4. Car battery

    Buried under a paving slab underneath the CSM's prize rose it will propel the aforementioned plant four feet in the air - or so I'm told.
     
  9. My husband destroying the public toilets in Nevez, threw a cigarette end down the toilet - a few seconds later an almighty bang followed by the village square being covered in shite, urine and small pieces of porcelain as the building collapsed. Husband went in looking like an undertaker, came out looking like Geronimo - badly singed!! Wet myself laughing - only he could perform such a deed and then ask "What happened?"
     
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  10. He wasn't in Clochemerle by any chance was he?
     
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  11. Back in my mechanic days, we had great fun.

    1 - Take a large black plastic dustbin. Flip it over and run two bare wires under it.
    2 - Fill said bin with gas from Oxy-Acetylene bottles.
    3 - Stand well back and using gloves apply wires to battery terminals
    4 - Watch said bin catapult over workshop, into dealership forecourt narrowly missing directors new lexus. Whoops.

    A different garage

    Take a wheel bearing and using an angle grinder, cut small grooves in the casing, place on finger or screwdriver and use a air line blower, spin up the bearing and launch it across workshop floor with the lights off. Watch the sparks :)

    Same garage as above, take the airline blower and duct tape a short plastic tube to it. Break apart a wheel bearing to get the bearings out, and use the blower to launch them across the workshop, taking care to shoot a cow-orker in the back :) Run and hide before he hits you.
     
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  12. Delete latex glove, replace with very large polythene bag
     
  13. A young gentleman annoyed my brothers wife while he was working away. She rang up almost in tears and told Mrs Seagull 0.1 that this lad would turn up at all hours to see his mate who lived next door and would blast his music out, shout, rev his engine, spit on the floor and generally act the cunt.

    She had a word with the lad next doors parents and they made all the right noises but did fuck all. She had a word with the lads directly and was simply ignored then laughed at as she went back in.

    She got that upset that she asked my missus if I'd sort it out before my bro got back. Although she thought it would get messy if I got involved she fucking knew that my brother would wrap a bat round someone's head or simply torch the car so she knew it need to be sorted before he got back.

    Me and my mate Gavin popped round and they promptly fucked off. As soon as they knew we weren't about they would come back and start again.

    After a week of this I finally blew my top and was talking about doing them over but Gavin had a better idea. They would drive to the bottom of the cul de sac near some trees and smoke weed out of view of his parents house.

    Cue me and Gavin giggling like a pair of fucking schoolgirls as we lie in wait like a pair of walts on an airsoft day out. They pull up in the shitbox Orion and wind down the windows as the start to skin up. I leap up like Lewis Colins and the Mark 8 Thunderflash goes in through the window.

    Not exactly the biggest pyrotechnic show I've ever seen but certainly the funniest. It had the desired affect as the lads chilled right the fuck out. Word even got around that my bro knew lads in the IRA as his missus is a bog trotter, although Gavin black so fuck knows how they came to that conclusion.

    13 years on we still piss ourselves at the thought of me bomb blasting out of those trees like a half pissed ninja.
     
  14. Little bit of Evo stick in a bin bag, seal said bag and let vapour work it's magic for a few mins. Introduce ignition and kiss your eyebrows goodbye.

    Drainpipe plus end cap, insert gas canisters, insert upside down into fire - stand back and watch drainpipe disappear :)
     
  15. I, allegedly, apparently, made a big bang when I was cutting the hedge in the back garden.

    I didn't notice the big blue flash, but apparently, allegedly Toppers saw it. Lo and behold, one hedge trimmer later and a broken wire, I was apparently the culprit. Is that why my hair is full of static still?

    Have you ever set fire to little plastic spoons though and watched the black bits rise to the ceiling?

    DO NOT DO THIS AT A LITTLE CHEF.
     
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