befriending a storeman for personal gain.

#1
ok there is a specific method of doing this, im uncertain of how. i am more of the direct "got any gucci shit you wanna give me, fella" .... usually when the QM is in earshot too. needless to say it doesnt work

how can you make it look like you actually like this person in order to get kit out of them. any tips for idle chit chat?

cheers
 
#2
Start in the bar with a pint or to. Dont actually buy him his drinks but make conversation and get into a round with him therefor making him think your a mate rather than another bloke trying to get gucci kit. Follow this up with a couple of passing hellos in the QM's then next time your in the bar ask him if he can get you something. Something not to gucci that would be quite easy to get yourself anyway but you need to make him feel like he's needed. Then slowly build up to the biggies. Ok it means trying to have conversation with a storeman but most of them understand small words.

Or you can always just find a female storeman, get her drunk, bum her, steal her underwear (or maybe take some photo's) then ransom it for gucci kit.
 
#3
Thebull140 said:
Or you can always just find a female storeman, get her drunk, bum her, steal her underwear (or maybe take some photo's) then ransom it for gucci kit.
Most of our stores women are extremely butch - it could be hard work.
 
#4
CardinalSin said:
Thebull140 said:
Or you can always just find a female storeman, get her drunk, bum her, steal her underwear (or maybe take some photo's) then ransom it for gucci kit.
Most of our stores women are extremely butch - it could be hard work.
Do you want those new lowas or a gps through the system?
 
#5
Thebull140 said:
CardinalSin said:
Thebull140 said:
Or you can always just find a female storeman, get her drunk, bum her, steal her underwear (or maybe take some photo's) then ransom it for gucci kit.
Most of our stores women are extremely butch - it could be hard work.
Do you want those new lowas or a gps through the system?
LOL...everyone respects a strong work ethic. Even our hideous dungaree-wearing, flat-topped Sapphic sisters! :wink:
 
#6
Thebull140 said:
Start in the bar with a pint or to. Dont actually buy him his drinks but make conversation and get into a round with him therefor making him think your a mate rather than another bloke trying to get gucci kit. Follow this up with a couple of passing hellos in the QM's then next time your in the bar ask him if he can get you something. Something not to gucci that would be quite easy to get yourself anyway but you need to make him feel like he's needed. Then slowly build up to the biggies. Ok it means trying to have conversation with a storeman but most of them understand small words.

Or you can always just find a female storeman, get her drunk, bum her, steal her underwear (or maybe take some photo's) then ransom it for gucci kit.

You sound like a fcukin expert !!!!!!!!!!! Well done Sir.


LT.
 
#7
Sod the subtlety, I've never yet met a storeman you coudnt bribe with good porn, they're all dirty ba$tards, its got something to do with spending so long in the dark and drinking enough tea to sink a small fishing boat.
You rock up at the QMs with half a dozen fresh cellophane wrapped copies of "Sweaty Mingers" or "Rank Flange & Heavy Weapons Monthly" and a new pair of Lowas will be yours before Normans thread of drool hits the counter.
 
#8
I've known guys who've given me a full issue of kit with no written record of me ever receiving said kit and I've known cnuts who've charged me for one cs95 t-shirt. Whats worked for me is just being matey with them. I knew one guy who was an ex-pongo and I asked him a few dits about his old regiment and he loved it. Eventually, I had to dodge incoming pieces of kit. Saved me a potentially horrendous C126ing by making the evidence 'disappear'. Good bloke he was!
 
#9
I always found that circumventing the software protection on the office PC so that they can install games works quite well. Of course, that only works if you are an IT geek.
 
#10
sandmanfez said:
Sod the subtlety, I've never yet met a storeman you coudnt bribe with good porn, they're all dirty ba$tards, its got something to do with spending so long in the dark and drinking enough tea to sink a small fishing boat.
You rock up at the QMs with half a dozen fresh cellophane wrapped copies of "Sweaty Mingers" or "Rank Flange & Heavy Weapons Monthly" and a new pair of Lowas will be yours before Normans thread of drool hits the counter.
so true.
 
#11
I run a stores and I'm desperate for friends. Please be my friend.

You can have anything on the shelves if you're nice to me.
 
F

fozzy

Guest
#12
Thebull140 said:
Or you can always just find a female storeman, get her drunk, bum her, steal her underwear (or maybe take some photo's) then ransom it for gucci kit.
Who said romance was dead? Sir, I salute you
 
#13
Withold their medication and only deliver it when you require the big favour/kit sign off
 
#14
[quote="Thebull140"Or you can always just find a female storeman, get her drunk, bum her, steal her underwear (or maybe take some photo's) then ransom it for gucci kit.[/quote]

you fcuked up with yours though most of the regt had already been there first
 
#16
But we are discussing storemen, maybe the rules on stealing from this group should be in internationl law acceptable?
 
#17
It's not stealing, it's redistribution. Don't forget, they call it "stores", which technically means that it is for storing and not for issuing. By (occasionally) issuing stuff to you, they are complicit in agreeing that this is a matter of semantics, ergo "storing" means "issues", and "theft" means "redistribution".

Yeah, if it's not bolted down, then it's begging to be acquired.
 
#18
And if it is bolted down, thats what tools were invented for!
 
#19
the_matelot said:
And if it is bolted down, thats what tools were invented for!
Only if you can redistribute them into your tool box before they are required. Anyway your not stealing from the storeman as such. It's not realy his/her gear anyway, your aquiring it from the army and they deserve it as retribution for that time you had to sweep the puddles off the main drag. Think if the storeman as the bank security guard who at the end of the day doesn't really car what happens to the contents of the vault as long as nobody disturbs him doing the crossword.
 
#20
Thebull140 said:
the_matelot said:
And if it is bolted down, thats what tools were invented for!
Only if you can redistribute them into your tool box before they are required. Anyway your not stealing from the storeman as such. It's not realy his/her gear anyway, your aquiring it from the army and they deserve it as retribution for that time you had to sweep the puddles off the main drag. Think if the storeman as the bank security guard who at the end of the day doesn't really car what happens to the contents of the vault as long as nobody disturbs him doing the crossword.
I see your point young Sir, so to steal from this worthless piece of sh't is ok because;
1. he is a low life
2. he is covered by insurance
3. it is God's will

I intend to carry out this mission when the moon is full, you expert advise would be appreciated.
 
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