Right, my daughterâs 4 and while no. 1 is in the kitchen proving to his mother that at the age of 6 not having the ability to count to 20 wonât preclude him entrance to Mons, no. 2 is sat on her faitherâs knee and only interested in Barbie as usual. The unclouded thoughts of a man whoâs not had a drink since Thursday due to a virus took me to the Barbie Â© (inc) Â© fÃ¼cking webcave. Therein, we found such saccharin, nauseating, spew suggesting .com videogame cÃ¼ntstrapping nightmares as reduced my lifeforce to a paternal trickle. When we finally caught four magic bÃ¤stard clouds on Pegasus the fecking winged chariot we âwonâ some sort of electronic gift voucher to spend even more cash on the 10 ft sophomoric, pornalike slutbag. Now, firstly - if yon Pegasus comes with a blonde Amazon aboard, half the Parachute Regiment would be shagging it too so it wouldnât get airborne with all that range glue up it anyway. Secondly, if la Barbieâs got 10 ft legs, her no doubt shaven twÃ¤t would swallow the horse whole. Finally, the look of total happiness on no 2âs beautiful fizzer means Iâll be doing this every night for a month. AND thereâs a fÃ¼cking fillum out! Is there no end to this madness? Will I be arrested for being the only Dad downing a 6 pack of Kronie at Crawley UCI at 9 on Saturday morning watching this crap?