Ban male (and ugly female) SSLC Officers

It is my humble opinion (as a LIM in a busy mess) that potential letching is being witheld from singlies due to the wholly unfair policy of recruiting males to hold SSLCs.

Every mess should be entitled to a yearly quota of 18yr old females to smarten the place up providing they pass a rigourous vetting procedure undertaken by the LIMs. The SLIM could preside such an event and, after a formal voting session, it would be his signature that would allow or disallow prospective individuals from furthering their SSLC application.

This process would inject a long awaited system by which fuglies could be kept out of the mess.

I look forward to your views.


War Hero
A slightly odd view there.  I take it that you don't get out much!

I suppose you're either ugly of incapable of competing with a recently post-pubescent teenager then?

Or are you the one always struggling to find a pretty young filly to bring to a Mess Ladies Dinner?  If you were as talented as the SSLC children then surely you would be the one populating the mess with all your young, free and single girlfriends?

I thought SSLC chaps spent their time in Grenoble skiing, being F%$k ALL use for anything else?  ???


And what have you done to improve the Mess aesthetics for your female colleagues?  If there aren't very many women nearby, is that because you treat all those who go into your Mess like (less satisfactory) 3D substitutes for your Loaded calendar?  Have you actually got anything interesting to say, or any attractive virtues?


I reckon the whole reason why we have Gap Year kiddies in the mess is so that they can be thoroughly beasted to do as many Orderly Officer duties, mess silver and property checks, decorating for parties (and clearing up afterwards) and all the other crap jobs that the proper subbies normally get given.

That being the case I couldn't give a damn if they're male, female, good looking or kangorillamooses - just so long as they don't realise what they're being used for.
Having a selection of young, impressionable, young fillies in the mess can never be a bad thing. Good for a bit of light chat, no heavy political discussion, a bit of phyz, setting and clearing functions and covering those ‘spare’ extra duties.

Doesn’t really matter if they are great looking and prevents the ones who have already snuck it in not get quite so jealous. The upstart chaps though think they’re the next General Patton. All that experience they have crammed into their 18 yrs along side the 3 weeks at Sandhurst. Sure there must be some good ones but heaven only knows where they go.

The lad we have is OK but I really only see him once a month and he’s not allowed full time in the mess (at least not unaccompanied).
We call them YTS Officers, but that probably giving them too much credit.  ;D
Yep, if memory serves a YTS qualification could be useful.


SSLC = Short on Stamina, Limited Capability.
Presumably it was changed to GYC for PC reasons, any good mneumonics for GYC?



War Hero
Gorgeous Young Chicks!


The whole point of SSLC totty is for them to be sent to Deutschland for those poor sex starved subbies to get their end away without spending their pay check in the local brothel!

Definitely ban the blokes, but keep the ugly females (they are always more thankful....) :-*
....or rather D-S thinks he will stand more of a chance ;)
Couldn't agree more about the ban, in Germany messes anyway.  It dosent really go far enough though there ought to be a better screening policy for fugly teachers and the like.  The target array could be a whole lot better if they let a couple of subalterns sit on the boardthat selects teachers etc to work in the land onf the hun!! 8)
The target array could be a whole lot better if they let a couple of subalterns sit on the boardthat selects teachers etc to work in the land onf the hun!!
I'd have gone with the Canadian supply teacher that got done for going over the side with a 15 y/o in Surrey. Not too picky about who she went after and up for some of the more unusual stuff, exactly the sort we need!

The Snob

Our GYC female has already recorded 4 targets in her 6 week stay with us. I think shes going down the nominal roll, but in height order, as opposed to the more usual way. If that's the case, I've got a long time to wait.  :(

I like horsegunner's point about fugly teachers and such. Birds are sent to the land of the hun for one reason - to be shagged by outstandingly good looking single male officers. Thus far, I see no reason to change this viewpoint...

Long live singlies!!  ;D ;D


Was on a course at Larkhill 4 year ago, having brekkie in the Mess, sitting opposite an RA GYC minger (female) who told her slightly more acceptable companion about the night before, which involved sharing her favours with two RA YOs at the same time - I believe a barbecue term was used.

As a non-RA cap badge wearer, several points came to mind:

1. Put me right off my weetabix
2. Whatever made her believe she had any kind of future in the Regulars after such behaviour
3. I hope they had several brown paper bags between them
4. I wonder if my cap badge GYC gals do the same

And to top it off, we all got CDTd that day as well !


Couldn't agree more about increasing the ration of fit young 18 year old girls in the Mess. Meanwhile the standard of GYC blokes has improved tremendously in 1 year. Last year had dealings with 2. One was incapable of breathing and thinking at the same time whilst the other spent his entire time trying to tell me how to do my job. Even told my (very) senior 1 up 'that I do think that we do things so much better in my Regiment'. Little Bu**er. This years batch are much more fun and will merrily stay up all night on the lash listening to all our boring stories.
Whatever made her believe she had any kind of future in the Regulars after such behaviour
That's why she was in the RA, no-one has a future in that mob.  ;D


War Hero
Kit Reviewer
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Spent a year living in the same mess as her. Discretion prevents me from saying anymore about her activities during that time- needless to say she carried on in pretty much the same vein! :-X

I saw her in the YOs' bar a couple of years later when she returned with her OTC on exercise- she claimed to have cleaned up her act when she rushed across to make sure none of the chaps from my mess told her colleagues about her Gap Year antics!

I doubt whether the Gunners would have her back as everyone up to the Comdt RSA and my CO knew of her nocturnal proclivities...

Interestingly enough, the 2 YOs involved in the original act were called in front of the SI the following day and given a mild dressing down whereas she was paraded in front of the Comdt  to be read the riot act.

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