Bagging a Celeb: Squaddies on T'Internet

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by BrunoNoMedals, Jul 12, 2011.

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  1. BrunoNoMedals

    BrunoNoMedals LE Reviewer

    Alright so not a squaddie per se, actually a jarhead, but the principle is the same:BBC - Newsbeat - YouTube marine gets date with Hollywood star Mila Kunis Basically, this cheeky sod appears to have ally'd himself to the max while on Ops, filmed a chat-up line to one of Hollywood's finest (and certainly one of my favourites), and managed to bag a top quality celebrity date to his Corps Ball. I reckon all you cnuts have missed a trick, because all the ensuing YouTube offers to stretch Dawn French's hoop will now become utterly passe. However, it does beg the questions: a) Who would you have targeted, and what would your YouTube one-liner have been? b) How does he now guarantee himself some post-party Kunis-loving?
  2. a) No idea - I know it would never work
    b) I would guess rohypnol, chloroform, or a strangle-hold

    Do you think she'll be getting a code red (or brown)?
  3. Easy. Emma Watson.

    "Oi, Emma! Put a decent frock on and get yourself down to ***** for the Summer Ball. There'll be plenty of grub to throw down your neck... You never know, you might even put some weight on and grow a decent set of norks. Then when you've been plied with loads of charmingly cheap plonk, I'll take you back to me wanking chariot and give you the good news. You never know, say please and I'll even agree to smash one up your wrong 'un. Oh... If you have any younger sisters, bring them too. But be sure to form an orderly queue for noshing me off."

    Don't see how she could resist.
  4. Ravers

    Ravers LE Reviewer Book Reviewer

    The Irish one from the Saturdays. Failing that all of the Saturdays.
  5. Ravers

    Ravers LE Reviewer Book Reviewer

    You're so racist. Just because Lenny Henry is blick doesn't mean he's rigged like a bull elephant.
  6. See, you're going on about Emma Watson being fit!....I've been saying that for 10 yrs! Nothing new ;)
  7. I seem to recall a Sapper meeting Katie Price during OP AGRICOLA 6 in 2001 and banging her for sometime afterwards til he got sick of the celebrity lifestyle.

    Perhaps some of you can also recall this and, even better, actually know the bloke?
  8. Yes, but she could still do to go mad in a Ginsters outlet and lay down a layer of feminine padding.

    More cushion for the push'n.

    Right now, I'd probably snap her like a wishbone.
  9. Am I the only one thinking who the hell is Mila Kunis?
  10. Kate Adie's the one. Perhaps some here will remember watching her her going for a piss through their NVGs. Remarkably handsome woman, despite her years, and a chassis you could bounce a Mastiff on.
  11. Thought he was 2 RTR?
  12. Ravers

    Ravers LE Reviewer Book Reviewer

    Of course he can dance, he's black.
  13. Not quiet sure if a Hollywood star would like to come into our mess. A Yank, over-the-top, 'Gimme a Hoo-her?', 'U-S-A! ... U-S-A!' style ball is one thing, but any poor unfortunate soul coming into ours would be striped naked, babooned and made to ring the bell.
  14. Voice of Meg on the cartoon Family Guy.

    More importantly, looks like this:
  15. What does being "babooned" mean? Given a paper bag full of nuts? Or shot for picking dried shit out of one's arse and then eating it with lengthy fingers? Your mess sounds like a horrific place, tbh. What if she/he wanted a latte and a wee chat?