Bad things to tell your wife

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Fang_Farrier, Sep 26, 2009.

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  1. Fang_Farrier

    Fang_Farrier LE Reviewer Book Reviewer

    Today mine was that her middle child, the one that that plays piano and fiddle had managed to dislocate her finger playing rugby.

    Yes, the sport that I'd assured after the last time one of "her" children had been hurt that it was unlikely to happen again.

    No, I hadn't bothered to take her to a hospital, as I had undislocated it myself!

    Looks like being a quiet night in the house the night!
  2. "Hey,have you met my other family ?"
  3. Spanish_Dave

    Spanish_Dave LE Good Egg (charities)

    Sorry love, I'm on rear party, (till the drugs work)
  4. Fang_Farrier

    Fang_Farrier LE Reviewer Book Reviewer

    Previous wife, wee while ago.

    I finally got a posting to Hong Kong says I, oh good says she.

    but it's only for 6 weeks says I, that's not too bad says she.

    and it's unaccompanied, says I, She said a lot of swearing!
  5. Remember that posting we're going on?...........well we ain't, oh and by the way that now means we're discharged in 8 months instead of 2 years!
  6. Bad things to tell your wife

    Your neice was a better fcuk was a bad idea :lol:
  7. When I was 34 I told mine I was fucking off with a 17 year old bint I'd met in a club. Me and the bint have been together now for 40 years, don't know (or care) where the ex-wife is. :D
  8. Good work!
  9. Bad things to tell your wife?

    'You'd better nip off down the Doc and get some treatment for clap'

    'But I don't have clap'!

    'You do now'
  10. Anything resembling the truth :D
  11. "Did you enjoy sex last night darling?"

    "Yes, it was great"

    "what were you thinking of?"

    "Your sister"

    Now can anyone tell me why that is the wrong thing to say??????????
  12. The 'sister' is legs?
  13. Pararegtom

    Pararegtom LE Book Reviewer

    Her sister is 14 and autistic :roll:
  14. Stop messing up MY kitchen.
  15. Guns

    Guns LE Moderator Book Reviewer
    1. The Royal Navy

    You are better in bed than all of your friends....