Bad TA jokes...

#1
The other day, i was shopping in Tescos. Needed some cheese, as my girlfriend wanted to do some foul pasta based... thing.

Anyway, looking at the receipt on the way out, i spot that the cheese was labeled as "Territorial Cheese", at which the missue pipes up "ooo, is that like cheese with half the commitment then?"

Not so good, when standing next to my old scout leader, who's son and daughter in law happen to be majors in the TA's...

:x

Anybody else heard stupid stuff said about the TA's, or bad jokes?
 
#3
"A lot of people think that those in the Territorial Army are not real soldiers. We are. We are well trained, highly disciplined fighting machines ready for war. We're just not available during the week."


From HERE
 
#5
Yeah here's one;

TA soldier gets Military Cross

A forklift truck engineer from the West Midlands has become the third TA soldier to be awarded the Military Cross in 15-years. Private Luke Cole, of the 4th Battalion, The Mercian Regiment, aged 22, was honoured for his conduct during a fierce fire fight in Afghanistan, in which he was shot twice. Pte Cole was serving with The 2nd Battalion, The Mercian Regiment, when the incident took place on a night patrol during which he was shot in the leg in a fire fight against the Taliban.

Despite his injury, Pte Cole returned fire, protecting himself and another wounded member of the patrol. While he was crawling over to give first aid to another member of the patrol he was shot again. Showing remarkable courage, he continued to go to the aid of the other wounded soldier to administer first aid and pass information on what was happening over the radio. Pte Cole then waited until a more seriously injured colleague had been evacuated before being rescued himself. Two men were killed and six others injured during the encounter.

Lieutenant Colonel Ivan Yardley TD, Commanding officer of 4 Mercian, said:

"I have known Luke for a number of years and he has always struck me as a calm, intelligent, professional soldier who enjoyed the excitement of being in the Territorial Army.

"As the Territorial Army approaches its 100th anniversary in April, it is particularly poignant to think of all the members of the TA who have served in previous wars and conflicts around the world.

"Pte Cole has shown the ability of the Territorial soldier to operate alongside his Regular counterparts as a part of that fighting unit. To hear what he did during that night in Helmand province makes all members of 4 Mercian proud to know him and we would like to congratulate both Luke and all members of 2 Mercian on what was a very difficult and challenging operational tour."
 
#6
Mongoose said:
Yeah here's one;

TA soldier gets Military Cross

A forklift truck engineer from the West Midlands has become the third TA soldier to be awarded the Military Cross in 15-years. Private Luke Cole, of the 4th Battalion, The Mercian Regiment, aged 22, was honoured for his conduct during a fierce fire fight in Afghanistan, in which he was shot twice. Pte Cole was serving with The 2nd Battalion, The Mercian Regiment, when the incident took place on a night patrol during which he was shot in the leg in a fire fight against the Taliban.

Despite his injury, Pte Cole returned fire, protecting himself and another wounded member of the patrol. While he was crawling over to give first aid to another member of the patrol he was shot again. Showing remarkable courage, he continued to go to the aid of the other wounded soldier to administer first aid and pass information on what was happening over the radio. Pte Cole then waited until a more seriously injured colleague had been evacuated before being rescued himself. Two men were killed and six others injured during the encounter.

Lieutenant Colonel Ivan Yardley TD, Commanding officer of 4 Mercian, said:

"I have known Luke for a number of years and he has always struck me as a calm, intelligent, professional soldier who enjoyed the excitement of being in the Territorial Army.

"As the Territorial Army approaches its 100th anniversary in April, it is particularly poignant to think of all the members of the TA who have served in previous wars and conflicts around the world.

"Pte Cole has shown the ability of the Territorial soldier to operate alongside his Regular counterparts as a part of that fighting unit. To hear what he did during that night in Helmand province makes all members of 4 Mercian proud to know him and we would like to congratulate both Luke and all members of 2 Mercian on what was a very difficult and challenging operational tour."
What's the punchline?
 
#7
some people have thick skins and no sense of humour :oops:

i thought the jokes were funny and i served in the TA for 10 years. :D

get a life
 
#8
served in the TA for ten years so in real life you just passed basic?
 
#9
These TA guys don't seem to have a sense of humour!

I think they took this thread a little to personnally!

Fcuking Stabs!!!
 
#11
TA joke? DCDS? opinions on the TA make me laugh, though not in a good way. Of course what makes me laugh is the SOSD's opinion of DCDS? as noty being intelligent enough to get a real job...
 
#12
The HAC?
 
#13
3 blokes want to join the TA Engineers.
The recruiting sergeant says "OK, if you can blow up a building and then tell me how many letters there are in the alphabet, I'll let you in."
First bloke blows up a house and shouts "There a 26 letters in the alphabet"
"You're in", says the Sgt
Second bloke blows up a farm building and shouts "There are 26 letters in the alphabet".
"You're in", says the Sgt
Third bloke blows up a shop and shouts "There are 24 letters in the alphabet",
"How do you reckon that?" asks the Sgt
"Cos I've just taken out B & Q"......

(You did say bad jokes)
 
#14
Personally I liked the tv sketch that parodied to TA ads of the day and showed Rory Bremner(?) and others running round Epping Forest and had lines like 'Dave Foster - Virgin' and 'Mike Smith - still lives with his mother' and ended with 'If you're a 30 year old virgin who still lives with his mother and you'd like to run around Epping Forest with twigs in your hat - Join the TA' Utter class. Anyone remember what show that was from?
 
#17
Biscuits_AB said:
Mongoose.....you're a dick.
You like using that dick quote, smoke one on occasions do you, or are you too intelligent for that? You genius you.
 
B

Biscuits_AB

Guest
#18
Ord_Sgt said:
Biscuits_AB said:
Mongoose.....you're a dick.
You like using that dick quote, smoke one on occasions do you, or are you too intelligent for that? You genius you.
I thought you'd pop up at the merest mention of 'dick'.

Now, are you going to keep this one going until the thread gets killed off like you usually do?
 
#19
Biscuits_AB said:
Ord_Sgt said:
Biscuits_AB said:
Mongoose.....you're a dick.
You like using that dick quote, smoke one on occasions do you, or are you too intelligent for that? You genius you.
I thought you'd pop up at the merest mention of 'dick'.

Now, are you going to keep this one going until the thread gets killed off like you usually do?
Oh yeah. Didn't you blow off about how intelligent you were by PM? You clever dullard you.....
 

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