Talking of deer, I was coming off night shift one night and driving back to Elgin when Bambi jumps out in front of the car and ricochets into the woods. I stopped to see if it was OK, and a mate who was just behind me stopped to see what the fuss was.
We found a dead young deer about 20 feet into the woods, and in a bit of shock decided I couldn't just leave it there so we picked it up and stuffed it into the boot of my car. Checking the front of the car there was a bit of a dent but nothing broken (well before crumple zones and plastic bumpers) so I drove the rest of the way into Elgin and decided I'd best report the accident to the plod.
I walked into the cop shop and told the grizzled old copper behind the desk I wanted to report an accident. He directed me to a side room and got his paperwork in order, then sat down opposite me and got out the required form. When he asked what had happened he just stopped, put his pen away and collected the forms saying "don't worry son, you don't have to report that".
At this point I asked what I should do with the carcass, "Where is it" says plod? "In the boot of the car" says I, "I can hardly put it out for the bins tomorrow the neighbours will complain".
He appeared to take pity on me and said that seeing as I had a bit of a dilemma he would help me out by disposing of the body, so we trooped out to the car park and he helped me get the dead deer out the boot and put it in a garage round the back of the station.
The next night I went in to work and my mate asked what had happened. I explained everything and he had this facepalm moment and told me the local butchers had a 24 hour hot line for road kill like that and probably would have given me 50 quid for it.
