Aussie ordinance corps major with very small dick

#1
In happy Darwin, am living next door to a 55 year old Ordinance Corps Major who is a 22 carrot nutter who has declared war on the entire block of flats because we don't all reverse into our parking spots.

He seems to think that a $95k Beemer 4wd gives him the right to lord it over us poor mortals who drive Discos.The idiot was laying cones across the communal car park last night and directing traffic.I did think it rich when he tried to put my Mrs and my 4 year old on a charge for insubordination for calling him a fucking wanker.

Have tried to appease the loon with offers of steak and beer, but suspect the idiot of damaging our cars.

Any suggestions? I am wondering at which point I should report the matter to his CoC as I would be far happier if he deserted ans signed up with Terry.

PS He is a charmless nutter who has never been on ops but he is the most angry anal little man that I have ever had the misfortune to come across and am worried for the poor buggers under his command.
 
#2
Kill him?

Just a suggestion.

Other suggestions exist.
 
#6
Have you tried not parking like a fully-paid-up, raving homosexualist?
 
#8
Have you tried not parking like a fully-paid-up, raving homosexualist?
Hmmm, parking like a mincer, living in Darwin and knowing the size of the bloke's tool. Is there something Bushmills would like to come out and tell us, do you think?
 
#13
or point him to this site parking site and tell him you are not that bad.
 
#14
"Ordinance" - you can't even tell the difference between religious law and munitions - why should we listen to the rest of your bleating
 
#15
Just laugh dismissively at the prick.
A bit over the top for an IA drill, mucker.

Try bumming him until he prolapses like Elton John first. Do NOT lose your reason, as Olrence seems to recommend.
 
#16
Anyway, surely as a member of the Ordinance Corps he's supposed to make up rules.
 
#18
Hmmm, parking like a mincer, living in Darwin and knowing the size of the bloke's tool. Is there something Bushmills would like to come out and tell us, do you think?
gizza kiss and I'll tell ya'.
 
#19
Of course you should all park properly and NEVER have to reverse out of a parking slot, he's quite right on that one and so you should all just get a grip and park properly.

Also him being a former Ordinance Corps Major makes him qualified to control a car park if nothing else, so be grateful you are getting this free service and don't complain.

However, if he is being a wanker and you've had enough of that then it's time to start a few tricks. Starting with reasonable practical jokes and pranks and escalating to complete dirty tricks if he doesn't stop, or if your sense of humour tells you to just leap in with the mean stuff anyway.

Of course you could just get someone to play the part of a Ordinance Corps General to have a word with him, and issue him with a repremand..
 
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