Asda Smart Price Booze

#1
Thank the Lord I don't drink any more, but my eye was drawn to the £6.60 bottle of voddy, plain white and green label (because basically they don't want you to buy it if you might but something dearer). On the bottle there is a space for, "What does it taste like?" and they have a spiel. That got me looking at the whiskey and gin. Then I thought, I wonder if they do a dark rum?

They do. The label on the bottle has to be seen to be believed. Under "What does it taste like?", it has two words. "Caramelised sugar". It might as well say, "Listen me old matelot. This is a seven pound bottle of rum. We can't be arsed lying to you. It doesn't have "Complex top notes redolent of a warm evening in St Lucia". It tastes of caramelised sugar. You know you're going to buy it. We know you're going to buy it. Get you to the checkout, rummy"
 
#3
To be fair if you are considering buying Smart Price booze they could write on the side "tastes like a cows arse end, but will make you blind" and you would still buy it.
 
#4
Its a shame they cant make all ASDA produce taste of Paraquat.
 
#5
A word of caution...I was tempted by some cheap Sainsbury's bitter. It is only 2.4% or some such - you would need to drink OFAH's weight in it to get mildly giggly!

Look this stuff is going to be visiting all of your major organs, like a conga of drunken booties on route to a roll-mat derby. You want to minimise the damage so don't buy cheap booze, even if it does promise you will get your eyesight back after three days.

Don't stint on venery, at the end of the day you will end up paying a hidden cost, e.g. "cheap whores - anal sores" as the old Somerset proverb has it.
 
#6
My pal and I tried the 2.4% beer years ago - we ended up knee deep in crushed aluminium, my willy had a .303 bore from the erosion caused by the rushing water, and I still didn't get drunk. Training beer, basically.

Headaches should be caused by a) the ethanol itself, b) higher fusil oils and nonsense like that, c) colourings and similar stuff.

Ironically it's the expensive whiskey made in the pot still that will tend to have more garbage in it. Cheap spirit is made in patent stills and should be cleaner.
 
#11
Fu[]ck me, i'd better get down to Asda for some booze! (might even power the motor)
 
#13
Sainsbury's own brand vodka was surprisingly better than I'd imagined.

I wouldn't have bought it as I prefer Smirnoff myself but it was brought to a party and was opened first.

Everyday is a school day as they say.
 
#14
for me does'nt matter how cheap/expensive spirits are because i only ever either drink them to get me hammerd asap or mix them with a soft drink or i drink them neat when im allready hammerd so quility means nothing really :D

as for a good lager thats a diffrent thing only stella or budweiser or becks :D only out of a bottle aswell draft lagers to me are crapola

id rather be sober then drink from a can :D
 
#15
5.56mm said:
It tastes like urine but its cheap.
Are you old enough to drink now?

Sc00by said:
for me does'nt matter how cheap/expensive spirits are because i only ever either drink them to get me hammerd asap or mix them with a soft drink or i drink them neat when im allready hammerd so quility means nothing really :D

as for a good lager thats a diffrent thing only stella or budweiser or becks :D only out of a bottle aswell draft lagers to me are crapola

id rather be sober then drink from a can :D
Oh, very classy...goes so well with the rest of your post :p
 
#16
I made the mistake of drinking a bottle of Aldi/Lidl's vodka one night, and had the unnerving experience of having weird salt like crystals erupting through my tear glands the next day.

Very peculiar indeed!
 
#19
Must be the back streets of Liverpool

Seriously though...

neighbour turned up at a party at ours a month or so back with a couple of packs of Tesco Cheapo Lager and proceeded to drink Stella. Will get me own back (or rather he will) at his birthday Party next month.
 
#20
Issi said:
I made the mistake of drinking a bottle of Aldi/Lidl's vodka one night, and had the unnerving experience of having weird salt like crystals erupting through my tear glands the next day.

Very peculiar indeed!
I had a similar thing happen with Netto own brand vodka. I bought it in France last year and it was stinking cheap - €5 a bottle
I wasn't sure whether or not to buy it but the Emperor was shopping with me and assured me that it would delicious.
The following day I felt terrible. In fact, the last time that I had felt that ill was in the Far East. Come to think of it, the Emperor had also gone shopping with me on that occasion.
 

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