ASBO jail threat

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by Blogg, Feb 23, 2007.

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  1. No, not the hoodies. Nor de Gangsta boys.

    Dorothy Evans, 81, from Abergavenny, for being a stroppy old cow. No doubt she is but even so!

    The majesty of the law will not be denied
  2. Shocking!
    Hell's Grannies ride again ... well one of them anyway ;-)
  3. Something I learned a a very young nurse was that a nasty old person was probabally a nasty young person. Age or ill-health are no excuse for being nasty.

    And by the sound of things, she probabally had it coming.
  4. Apparently she's an evil old witch, she can't get away with it just because she's old, it's bad enough that she, like all old people, push in front of you in the line at Sainsbury's on a thursday or friday. Let alone make her neighbours life a misery.

    If it was some Chav ASBOer no-one would bat an eyelid.
  5. If it was some chav ASBOer the winkers we call judges would let them off or give them a suspended because we dont have any jail cells available

    tough on crime tough on the causes of crime ha bloody ha
  6. If it was some chav ASBOer the winkers we call judges would let them off or give them a suspended because we dont have any jail cells available

    tough on crime tough on the causes of crime ha bloody ha
  7. The last time I was in Abergavenny or close by as it was shut due to roadworks, some munter hit the back of my car and said it was my fault.

    It doesn't mention if the old dragon has offspring.
  8. I totally agree, thats is my observation as well , in my job I come across a lot of Victor Meldrews, I just tell them to feck off and die.
  9. If the old witch is banged up she will most likely promptly and selfishly die. It will then emerge that a prison space was made available by early releasing an unstable crack whore who promptly went on a killing spree.

    Huge outcry, vast public enquiry and PC do gooder liberal hand wringing with the end result that nobody who is old, female & witchy can ever be slung into jail no matter how evil.

    Thus the country becomes even more of a hell hole as vile old witches run amok in Supermarkets and Post Offices without fear of retribution. This leads to ugly mobs taking their revenge on a rogue element in society and after Sky News transmits lurid images of crowds baying around a burning at the stake they are all given close protection at vast cost and huge drain on manpower.

    About this time a Election comes along and parties vie with each other to show who can do the most for these vulnerable and unfortunate witches who are simply misguided and lack opportunities in life. Proposals to turn our surpus of Naval assets into secure cruise ships are put forward and for those who cannot take to life afloat Army bases will become a safe and nurturing environment in which the individual can flourish. Being a manifesto promise it has to be done.

    The Prime Minister then sets targets for the number of witches cared for and the standards of happiness they must achieve. The numbers are not a problem are there is a constant supply but the happiness bit is rather more difficult as nobody can agree what these are or how to properly measure them as every single one is a miserable old cow at the best of times.

    After some PR disasters with witches in care falling victim to Spontaneous Human Combustion due to boredom and playing with spells, the Office for Standards in Enjoyment for Witches, OFSTEW, is set up at vast cost. The net result is that all other tasks are set aside and the sole function of the Army and the Navy becomes that of getting good OFSTEW results. CrabAir gets off light as it merely shifts them around using special pods mounted beneath the many otherwise unused EuroFighters

    Eventually somebody gets fed up and slots a whole lot of them, whereupon loads of senior bods end up in the Hague charged with crimes against humanity.

    So, on the whole better to do nothing really.
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  10. One daughter.
  11. Oh come ON! this is Arrse! Are you honestly trying to tell me you don't find the thought of an 80+ granny busting out a moony amusing! I'm SO disappointed in you!
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  12. You put a lot of thought into that one didn't you?
  13. Even for you, IEDD, that has to be a record, the post you replied to is 4 years old, FFS.
    • Like Like x 1
  14. bollocks hahahaha! I blame bigbird and PMN1 ;)