Artificial Virginity Hymen NSFW ?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by fairycakes, Feb 4, 2010.

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  1. Men a chance to relive your wedding night with your pure virgin bride.
    NSFW? Not able to post the pics from the website.
    http://www.gigimo.com/main/product/Artificial,Virginity,Hymen,2299.php?prod=2299

    No more worry about losing your virginity. With this product, you can have your first night back anytime. Insert this artificial hymen into your vagina carefully. It will expand a little and make you feel tight. When your lover penetrate, it will ooze out a liquid that look like blood not too much but just the right amount. Add in a few moans and groans, you will pass through undetectable. Its easy to use, clinically proven non-toxic to human and has no side effects, no pain to use and no allergic reaction.


    This Artificial Hymen Feature:

    * Easy to use
    * Place inside vagina 15-20 minutes before intercourse
    * Soluble and expandable at body heat
    * Clinically proven non-toxic to human
    * No side effects, no pain to use, no allergic reaction
    * Made in Japan
     
  2. NSFW Walt.
     
  3. Your point being?
    Are you telling us that you are now a complete cunt?
     
  4. Simple way to tell if your missus is a virgin on your wedding night. Paint one knacker yellow, one purple. Then paint your pr1ck red and white in the manner of a barber's pole. If she says "That's the funniest looking c0ck and balls I've ever seen", punch her in the face and say "Fcuk you, you slapper".
     
  5. There's one for gays too.

    Artificial Virginity RINGPIECE
    Artificial Bumhole reducer
    USD 29.90 USD 39.90
    Suggest a price
    Product ID: 2299

    No more worry about losing your virginity. With this product, you can have
    your first night back anytime. Insert this artificial ringpiece into your hoop carefully. It will expand a little and make you feel tight. When your lover cracks open your back doors, it will ooze out a liquid that looks like shit. Its easy to use, clinically proven non-toxic to humans and has no side effects, no pain to use and no allergic reaction.


    This Artificial RINGPIECE Feature:
    Easy to use
    Place inside hoop 15-20 minutes before getting drilled
    Soluble and expandable at body heat
    Clinically proven non-toxic to human
    No side effects, no pain to use, no allergic reaction
    Made in Japan
     
  6. FFS I being a slow prick today, just got that one :D
     
  7. No more worry about losing your virginity. With this product, you can have
    your first night back anytime. Insert this artificial ringpiece into your hoop carefully. It will expand a little and make you feel tight. When your lover cracks open your back doors, it will ooze out a liquid that looks like shit. Its easy to use, clinically proven non-toxic to humans and has no side effects, no pain to use and no allergic reaction.


    This Artificial RINGPIECE Feature:


    Ho Ho fcwuking ho....... never laffed so much... I nearly spilled my cocoa..... :lol:
     
  8. Unnecessary.

    I shagged a doris at a Christmas party. Afterwards I said:

    "I'm sorry - if I'd known you were a virgin I would have taken more time".

    She replied:

    "If I'd known you were going to take more time I would have taken my tights off".



    And I thought her toes curled up because she really fancied me........
     
  9. Or as my missus said:

    "Ooh look! It's just like a prick, only smaller!"
     
  10. Not been around kids? Don't suppose you get much sound looking through binoculars...
    All toys are referred to as a teddy bear, shortened to teddy, if they are of the fluffy cute variety as thus.