Arrse Shaving

#1
The dilemma,

I work in a warm atmosphere and now the humid weathers creeping in, Im increasingly finding myself scratching my arrse more.

As I got stuck in today with a furious up and down motion I gots a thinking...

Whats the best way to shave my bum beard?
 
#3
Try doing the Dance of the Flaming Arrseholes & when the paper burns right down to your rusty bullethole, spray brandy/vodka on it to put it out. Your sheriff's badge will be hair-free for life after that :wink:
 
#4
Shave your crack and you'll start getting arrse sweat patches and chronic chefs arse without all the hair to catch it though fella 8O
 
#6
Civi_Git said:
Shave your crack and you'll start getting arrse sweat patches and chronic chefs arse without all the hair to catch it though fella 8O
Point taken, but turn me to the side and my arrse looks like a white bread bap stuffed with hair.
 
#9
leave it well alone or there will be more clag-nuts to flick at people.
 
#10
salforddude said:
surely your young lady will help you out
She did it for me
Was that before or after the insertion of the Thai love beads? 8O
 
#11
A_Knocker_Till_The_End said:
leave it well alone or there will be more clag-nuts to flick at people.
Yes, gruff-nuts are the only advantage of having a crack packed with hair.
 
#14
What's the deal with clinkers these days ? I haven't had one for years, and goddam it I miss em ! They came to be like friends hanging around an arrsehole, you knew they were there, but you could ignore them.
 
#15



be careful.
 
#16
rockpile said:
In the jungle we didn't wear underwear to solve this sort of problem - nor socks.
where were you putting your socks that the removal of them reduced bum sweat problems?
 
#18
A_Knocker_Till_The_End said:



be careful.
That is a serious rusty bullet hole! Looks like he's been dipping his arrse in blister agent....... 8O
 
#19
Crouch like a gorrilla, whack a dollop of shave cream, rinse hands and dry (so that you can get a firm grip of the butt cheek, re-crouch and spread left cheek (for a righthander) and a few quick motions with the blade in your right and you're sorted. That area is actually like a hyenas scrotum so the cut risk is less than you'd think. The right side is trickier - either stretch left again and be careful (deepish squat recommended), or go for a slightly tricky stretch right cheek with left hand deal - you only need to grab the hip because it's all connected.

You'll feel 'kin luvvly afterwards. I'd recommend Madonna's "Like a virgin" as the soundtrack for the post shave cuppa.
 
#20
On a serious note, Wash your arse every day using a flannel.

If you are in dusty places, fill a litre bottle with water, squat and dribble the water down your back, rubbing your hoop with the said flannel.

:arrow: Cyclists know very well about hoop hygiene.

If you get boils. you have not been washing your arrse :evil:
 

Similar threads

Latest Threads