ARRSE Regiment (V) Reserves

Tool

LE
I'm putting together a med pack for the regimental nurse, Gladys.

A selection of miniatures
Pile ointment, 1 gallon
Gout lotion
Denture fixative ,battlefield strength ( Gripfil )
Combat colostomy bags
Inhalers ( essence of fry up )
Surgical alcohol ( with lemonade top )
Gaviscon epi pens
Copy of Razzle July 1998
Nothing to do with the last item on your list - no replacement glasses? Not even NHS pundadeflectors? At least two sets. One for short-sighted tw@s, one for those whose arms are not long enough.
 

Ritch

LE
I nominate @dingerr for the regimental mascot. All you need is to attach a lead to his wheelchair and you're away. He'll probably shît less than a Shetland Pony or a goat.
 

Dwarf

LE
But he wasn't inf, so unlike a goat he won't eat anything and everything you give him.

But we could name him Woodbine as you take him out for a drag.
 
I nominate @dingerr for the regimental mascot. All you need is to attach a lead to his wheelchair and you're away. He'll probably shît less than a Shetland Pony or a goat.

Said poor soul will have to empty his dock before parades to stop him crapping on the CO's shoes.

Volunteers? Form a line there.
 

Dwarf

LE
Said poor soul will have to empty his dock before parades to stop him crapping on the CO's shoes.

Volunteers? Form a line there.
Volunteers?

Who can play a piano? Stand in that line.

Etc.
 
Please forgive the tardiness of my input to this thread.

Is it too late to throw my hat into the ring as Chief Muscle Buster?

If it helps I've still got my blue serge trousers and my own whistle.

TIA
ETA My white daps need a bit of work...:smile:

Morning @Club Swinger,
Not thread related but this, from one of the local 'comics' recently.
Screenshot_20210730-185517_Photos~2.jpg
 
While we're on the subject, what's with all this 'attack at dawn' nonsense?

Yes, the enemy will be tired, but I'm like death warmed up in the mornings.

About 10 ish, after I've read the paper and had a cup of joe, thanks.
 

Dwarf

LE
What about a morning warm up, then lunch and after a nap?
 

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