I'm a spectacularly opaque but busy executive. I'm a cross between Malcolm Tucker and Dr Watson. Keeping up with Arrse has been a nightmare, and my PA refuses to produce a daily digest. Therefore could I ask that the edited hilights go here for the benefit of one and all as an Arrse News Feed? Not the intrigue and the post and counter-post, but the facts. Here's what I mean: The Nigger/Paki thread - absolute mong-flypaper. But who has it claimed? Lists please. 5A - has he gone or is he back? Why did this happen and why is this important? Resignations. When someone turns turtle and pokes off, i.e. Western and Tropper I'd like to be pointed to the relevant meltdown for a good giggle. Who the latest Roland Friesler/Alf Garnett/Nigel Farage clone is and where he's posting. I'm all up for a sort of court and social section at the end but frankly I find all the gastropods/molluscs stuff a bit confusing. This will enable me to stay current without having to give a shit about the ACF, medals, why some chav thinks I should love a certain football team, and JPA. Posted at this time to avoid being liked because that's just gay and they pretend to be PMs. Loose Minute format preferred. Many thanks and get to it.