ARRSE Kennel Club - A Dog Owners Thread

One of SWMBO's friends in the village was told off yesterday for letting her dog bark at someone from her own front garden. The dog is a bearded collie, a new find from the dogs' home, and as daft as a brush. The bloke is a twot.
Dunno. You don't think lone female with four hounds would be getting into 'crazy dog lady' territory?
Nah, a friend has 7 and counting, she's only slightly potty.
Nah, a friend has 7 and counting, she's only slightly potty.

We have our own version of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves down the road, although she's down to three at the moment, all were or are gently decaying Jack Russells. Snow White is a bit optimistic as she's a lovely woman but built like a polar bear.


They're all the right one. People are the problem.

Couldn't agree more on the people part. That said I think a dog knows when its found somebody who will look after it. Many years ago when we went to choose a puppy we were told that a few were still available. We went to have a look. They always tell you in books never to pick the runt, go for the one that's full of beans etc. The owner showed us in and we were met by a handful of excited Berners. Then from behind a tree came a little one, a bit shy and inquisitive looking. It was love at first sight, she got to us and hung on. Maybe she knew it was her chance to be the chosen one. It worked, happy happy years with a wonderful and faithful companion. I still miss her.

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When we went to see our Buddy he came straight out and over to my wife . nuff said
Despite having three dogs that I love, and they love us back, I don’t much post here or read it - I really struggle with death of the little bundles of joy, and that’s very common, so excuse my intrusion on y’all’s thread.

However, I had to post this. Service dogs in training - how to cope with the cinema or theatre. Apparently this is a class of dogs in a live theatre with actors on the stage. Performing for the bowsers :)



War Hero
Many thanks to everyone who has taken the time to send their best wishes and condolences. It is comforting to know that many strangers know how I feel and have empathy for me. I have almost stopped blubbering like a big girl but little things still set me off.
Thanks again. This thread is one of the reasons that I stay on arrse its where to good guys hang out.
You know you are not alone in this, right? All us big rufty tufty types are reduced to a blubbering mess when it comes to our best friends and we all absolutely feel for you right now.
However, I had to post this. Service dogs in training - how to cope with the cinema or theatre. Apparently this is a class of dogs in a live theatre with actors on the stage.

If it was the inside of the House of Commons the country would be in safer hands.


Bit special looking that one. And....she knew it I'd wager.
Oh yes she knew it well. Particularly in the morning at silly o'clock. "C'mon shake a leg or four."
"Nah I'm having a kip. Its comfy here and its cold outside, I need at least another couple of hours."
Once in the car it was no problem she'd sit behind my seat and when I slowed to pass the main gate she'd sit up in the passenger seat.

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The night time routine was rather comical. She'd sit downstairs when I went to bed. Then after a 10 mins or so would sneak quietly upstairs. Next the head would pop up at the bottom of the bed to check to see if the occupant(s) were asleep. Three legs would slowly and carefully be placed on the bed followed by a last check and then in one deft move the last leg would give a push off so that she could get all four on the bed and circle down into a ball. If we looked up we'd get a look in return of "What? I've been here all the time. Go to sleep, you're disturbing me."


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Showing signs of a return to puppyhood now she's 6 and three quarters, and a mother.

Small stick not quite sticky enough? Swap it for a GBFO Stick and look cross when told to leave it!
Nelson, Son No1 Mk2 Lad/ridgeback cross is staying at Meaty Towers whilst he is away attending to HMG's pleasure.

He is, without doubt the most greedy dog I have ever encountered.

Yesterday evening I was painting my boots up with neats foot oil, Nelson was "helping" by licking the oil off. Easy solve, hold boots over work surface so he can't reach them.

Job jobbed, boots left on work top.

Toddle off to bed at 11 pm.

Woken at 0300 by a series of explosive diahorrea farts, light on to survey the damage. Shit covering rug, shit covering empty shotgun sleeves, shit splatter on carpet. Sam & Bella on bet, Nelson under bed -looking a tad sheepish.

Rolled up rug and put outside, shotgun sleeves washed off under shower, shit scraped up, upholstery/carpet cleaner used to restore good order, back to bed.

0630 re-awake, downstairs to make tea and toast, let dogs out, feed dogs.

Make way upstairs followed by dogs in order to help Mrs Meaty Mk 2 to greet the new day happened to notice that bowl that had held the neats foot oil had been licked clean. Nelson had climbed onto the work surface and with commendable skill and agility had walked along the length of the crockery and pan laden top to get to a small china bowl.

Dogs, Invented by God to make humans happy.

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