ARRSE For Christmas.

#1
If I have to hear the singy songs on the bloody radio about Chrimble again, I swear to God the dog will get a kick. However, just to cheer you up pop-pickers, here is a blast from the past:

Nutstrangler's Poem

Shove your Mariah Carey, I want Nutstrangler to sing me it!!!!

Any more efforts as good? Cut and paste of MDN's is verboten.
 
#2
I am rather disappointed. I thought that you were finally giving in and rogering your back passage with a Yule Log for the festive season.

Oh well. :(
 
#3
Gremlin said:
I am rather disappointed. I thought that you were finally giving in and rogering your back passage with a Yule Log for the festive season.

Oh well. :(
If thegimp is going to the christmas do, he can bring me his Yule Log.

Eeeh remember the days though gremmers, when life was simple?
 
#4
Ah the joys of living abroad, they seem less interested by this Christmas business than in the UK. I'm not a fan of Christmas myself, but I'm always keen for a bit of arrse!
 
#5
theprior said:
Ah the joys of living abroad, they seem less interested by this Christmas business than in the UK. I'm not a fan of Christmas myself, but I'm always keen for a bit of arrse!
You have to pay for it nowadays.

Keep an eye on Charity Auctions :wink:
 

TheIronDuke

ADC
Book Reviewer
#6
theprior said:
Ah the joys of living abroad, they seem less interested by this Christmas business than in the UK. I'm not a fan of Christmas myself, but I'm always keen for a bit of arrse!
Ah, Christmas is a nightmare but its no reason to leave the Island.

Around the 20th, Big Silver Bird Carry Me Away.

First class for choice. Cheers. A month on a sun-kissed beach with my lovely wife, then back to Blighty just when the demented bint is getting right on my tits.

Then its back to my day job. Asessing how much our mature forests contribute to the absorbtion of CO2 gasses.

Dirty work. But someone has to do it.

Happy Christmas to you all. Even though it is still November.
 
#7
Duke you lucky man! I lack a) the resources b) the wife c) the assessment capabilities to do it your way. The woman seems uncommonly concerned by my lack of interest in Christmas so she's demanding I show her around London at Christmas. My arguments that it's the same just slightly tackier went unheeded.

And Dale, I'm bloody well not paying the low loader your arrse comes on - charidee or not!
 
#9
The_Snail said:
If I have to hear the singy songs on the bloody radio about Chrimble again, I swear to God the dog will get a kick. However, just to cheer you up pop-pickers, here is a blast from the past:

Nutstrangler's Poem

Shove your Mariah Carey, I want Nutstrangler to sing me it!!!!

Any more efforts as good? Cut and paste of MDN's is verboten.
After digging around on my HD:
Linky Safe(ish), speakers reqd.
 
#10
PE4rocks said:
The_Snail said:
If I have to hear the singy songs on the bloody radio about Chrimble again, I swear to God the dog will get a kick. However, just to cheer you up pop-pickers, here is a blast from the past:

Nutstrangler's Poem

Shove your Mariah Carey, I want Nutstrangler to sing me it!!!!

Any more efforts as good? Cut and paste of MDN's is verboten.
After digging around on my HD:
Linky Safe(ish), speakers reqd.
The full song here on you tube : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GMTxrFTr7hk

NSFW Kevin Bloody Wilson
 
#11
I can't believe that they already have bloody decorations up here. Next it will be fcuking carols and shite Wham songs piped through the PA.
 
#12
re-stilly said:
I can't believe that they already have bloody decorations up here. Next it will be fcuking carols and shite Wham songs piped through the PA.
Think thats bad, christmas lights went up in August and some people have got inflatable santa's in their front gardens already. The whole world has gone crackers :roll:
 
#13
Look, I don't know if this is the right time or place to make this confession, it being the NAAFI after all. But last weekend my youngest offsprung came to visit with his girlfriend, they are going down under for Christmas and New Year so won't be sponging off me like every other year.

Oh, you've heard have you that we have part funded the trip by giving them a wad of wonga to pay for a decent hotel in Sydney at New Year, well it wasn't my fucing idea right.

Anyway Mrs MV decided we shoudld have the whole Turkey Dinner with all the trimmings last Saturday and not only that but she's put the fucking tree and decorations up too. She has gone stark raving bleeding doolally, silly cow.

So go on do your worst, give me what for, I deserve it, I've been decidedly cowardly on the subject.

But at least I took the fuse out of the plug on the stereo so she couldn't play carols and Susan MongBoyle downloads. Fuced I said, I'll get a new one for Xmas. And suddenly tonight it will start working again!!
 
#16
Look you fcukin poor excuse for a foreskin, take control of your household preferably at the end of a ball pein hammer and shove the tree fairy up the arrse of your trouser wearing wife. :D
 
#18
re-stilly said:
Look you fcukin poor excuse for a foreskin, take control of your household preferably at the end of a ball pein hammer and shove the tree fairy up the arrse of your trouser wearing wife. :D
Better, but still namby pambying about, I thought impaling her on the tree itself and giving it her up the hoop would be better for a DP, :lol:
 
#19
Minnesota_Viking said:
re-stilly said:
Look you fcukin poor excuse for a foreskin, take control of your household preferably at the end of a ball pein hammer and shove the tree fairy up the arrse of your trouser wearing wife. :D
Better, but still namby pambying about, I thought impaling her on the tree itself and giving it her up the hoop would be better for a DP, :lol:
That would be OK but I was thinking of the rash you would get from the friction of the Pine needles on your nut sack. Just thinking of your welfare but hey your scrotum
 

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