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Arrse Fashion Week

#1
I switched on my telly this morning and was confronted with images of horror, malnurished woman dragging their skelital forms over a distance while wearing rags and tea cossies . . . . . . . . . then one walked down the cat walk dressed in silver tin foil with A TIN FOIL CUBE AS A HEAD!!!!! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
Now I worked out that fashion is a bit of a con at an early age and if the "Designers" as recycling Dr Who/Blakes 7 costumes as fashion then we are all doomed, DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMEEEDDDDD I tell ya!

My Fashion is some what lacking, well to tell the truth it's no existance. I'm still dress the same way I did when it was the Eighties - Levi jeans, black t shirt, boots. Simple.

How does this relate to other Arrse Fashionista's?
What would Arrse put on the cat walk (other than a bar mit Bavarian Serving Wenches).
 
#2
I only wear animal products. My trousers are made from whaleskin, the stitching being made entirely of newborn child's hair, my shirt is made of fine strips of golden eagle eyelids and my shoes are panda skulls, treated with a mixture of sharksfin oil and newly-orphaned arfican children's tears.
 
#3
LVH raises an interesting point. And work is slow so...

I'm no style guru (cargoes, polo shirt, dessie boots) but I've started to get increasingly intrigued by the dress cat of the indigenous population where I work.

Ok, ok, Borat wasn't filmed as a fashion documentary, but the locals here are just, well, odd. It's like a mix of knock-off slutty designer gear (for the chicks) and circa 1987 Miami Vice new romance. I saw a bird yesterday in a very tight tshirt with the "designer" label "MORGUN" across her tits and a bandana (WTF???). Another fave of mine is the tight black "Dolce & Havana" blouse, over a leather jacket-sleeves-pushed-up.

For the blokes it's a bit less diverse, I swear, to a man these dudes all wear white pointy-Alladin shoes, tracksuit bottoms, string T shirts and shades. Very comfy for squatting around in and spitting - national pastime it appears.

Obviously, the above is complemented with the gentle eye-watering whiff of Channel's new fragrance: Au De Nothadafeckinwashinamonth. Shudder...

I'm thinking of bringing a couple of local fashion purchases back for the missus, just to ensure she never speaks to me again.

Then there's the Septics.....
 
#4
arby said:
I only wear animal products. My trousers are made from whaleskin, the stitching being made entirely of newborn child's hair, my shirt is made of fine strips of golden eagle eyelids and my shoes are panda skulls, treated with a mixture of sharksfin oil and newly-orphaned arfican children's tears.
You work for the Body shop don't you :D :D
 
#5
I put a ban of Kate F*cking Moss, for a start. Talentless scrubber, junkie and Doherty-hag.

Then I'd put Claudia Schiffer, wearing naught but a winning smile and 5 gallons of my tadpole-toothpaste.
 
#6
arby said:
I only wear animal products. My trousers are made from whaleskin, the stitching being made entirely of newborn child's hair, my shirt is made of fine strips of golden eagle eyelids and my shoes are panda skulls, treated with a mixture of sharksfin oil and newly-orphaned arfican children's tears.
i should let you borrow my car, completely decked out with siberian tiger skin covered seats, baby seal eyes for headlights and it only does 1MPG

part of that is shamelessly ripped from denis leary
 

Sixty

ADC
Moderator
Book Reviewer
#7
Obviously I only wear offensively loud moleskin trousers (how many poor moles had to die to make them I don’t know) and pink or sky-blue shirts.

I’m never out of place anywhere. Apparently.
 
#8
Sixty said:
Obviously I only wear offensively loud moleskin trousers (how many poor moles had to die to make them I don’t know) and pink or sky-blue shirts.

I’m never out of place anywhere. Apparently.
Loud Shirts Rule ........ strangly my GF does not stand close to me when I'm wearing one of my Mambo Shirts, odd that :D
 

Grownup_Rafbrat

LE
Book Reviewer
#10
LordVonHarley said:
arby said:
I only wear animal products. My trousers are made from whaleskin, the stitching being made entirely of newborn child's hair, my shirt is made of fine strips of golden eagle eyelids and my shoes are panda skulls, treated with a mixture of sharksfin oil and newly-orphaned arfican children's tears.
You work for the Body shop don't you :D :D
Now it's owned by L'Oreal, I'm sure you're right!
 
#11
arby said:
I only wear animal products. My trousers are made from whaleskin, the stitching being made entirely of newborn child's hair, my shirt is made of fine strips of golden eagle eyelids and my shoes are panda skulls, treated with a mixture of sharksfin oil and newly-orphaned arfican children's tears.
Are you Montgomery Burns??
 
#12
indoubitabley said:
Here's a picture of me, lazing about in casual wear...

Summer range

This is a little more formal (I must keep of those NAAFI growlers)...

Evening wear

And for those nice romantic evenings out....

Formal Attire
Mutt you really are the ultimate style guru...
Which outfit for the Liverpool crawl? Just so i can adjust my medication accordingly.
 
#14
LordVonHarley said:
My Fashion is some what lacking, well to tell the truth it's no existance. I'm still dress the same way I did when it was the Eighties - Levi jeans, black t shirt, boots. Simple.
The eighties????. I've been wearing that stuff since the sixties. Straights £19.11d Flares 25 shillings. And flares are back in fashion. Ms Skids sister brought me a pair back from the states, but I'm too shy to wear them
 
#15
ArmyYid said:
arby said:
I only wear animal products. My trousers are made from whaleskin, the stitching being made entirely of newborn child's hair, my shirt is made of fine strips of golden eagle eyelids and my shoes are panda skulls, treated with a mixture of sharksfin oil and newly-orphaned arfican children's tears.
Are you Montgomery Burns??
Nope, I just have no imagination.
 
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