Arrse Dragoons Den

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by sebcoe, Aug 17, 2009.

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  1. After reading a number posts on our friend socialism, and its obvious contributors, it seems there are a lot of arrsers with bags of business experience & entrepeneurism and a lot of arrsers who have become un employed and want to make a start so set you pitch and see if we can set you on the right path.
  2. OK let's start on how not to do it. Sven/Whet is a Prime Example! A million reasons why you CAN'T do something. Find a single reason why you can and then do it. Example - my Family Business is day care for adults with learning difficulties. The ex-wife was the expert on this.

    So one day she says "Let's start a business in this". This involved her packing in her job (£1000 a month after tax - 12 years ago!) and staring up the business. Did we live like povert stricken mice - yes! CCJ's became almost a yawn! Now we have Barclays phoning us up asking if we want to borrow money!

    The hard part is taking the first step! And it involves getting the correct mind set!
  3. I'll need a stout ship and a hardy crew for a voyage of dicovery beyond the western sea, who knows what manner of treasure and strange beasts lie just out of reach.
  4. Can I drink my own p1ss from the outset? If so, count me in
  5. Earn ££££££££££££££££££'s

    Get Rich Quick!!

    Simply set up a premium rate phone line.

    To find out how phone

    0900 738 273


  6. Feck me, If I had t1ts and a snatch.I'd be set for life! :D
  7. Yay, loaded for life, no more paying for beers and meals out here I come! 8O :D
  8. Command_doh

    Command_doh LE Book Reviewer

    Surprisingly cheap for a clack re-fit, that. Almost worth getting a mate pished up on a stag do (or something similar) and booking him in for a fanny fit. For a laugh, of course.
  9. Cheap, and not so good. If you want a decent job doing so that you can have your wicked way with him, then you have to pay real money. This is the best in the world, and the guy who did an excellent job on your's truly: Suporn Clinic
  10. As recommended by The History Channels erstwhile star
  11. Provided your business plan is sound and it helps if you have a fallback then anybody can do it. What you absolutely need is a dogged determination to succeed even in the face of adversity. I don't know about fellow arrsers in the business world but I am certainly feeling the pinch at the moment but even if the temptation to pack it in and return to working for someone is immense I will not do it. The ability to diversify is partially the key. You only have to look at the longevity of builders and farmers to see that.
  12. We open a company called the Arrse Tickler's Faggots Fan Club.

    We take out an advert in the back page of some gay mag, advertising the latest in arrse-intruding dildos, you sell it with, I dunno, "does what no other dildo can do until now", "the latest and greatest in sexual technology", "guaranteed results or your money back", all that bollocks. Now these dils cost twenty-five quid a pop - that's a snip for the amount of pleasure they're gonna give the recipients.

    But they send their cheques to the other company name, nothing offensive, er, Bobbie's Bits or something, for twenty-five quid. You take that twenty-five quid, you stick it in the bank until it clears. Now this is the smart bit - you send back the cheque for twenty-five pound from the other company name, "Arrse Tickler's Faggots Fan Club", saying we're sorry, we couldn't get the supplies from America because they ran out of stock.

    Now you see how many people cash that cheque - not a single soul, because who wants their bank manager to know they tickle arrse when they're not paying cheques?

    Lock, Stock the fcuking lot. :D
  13. I like this idea, I'm game..
  14. Or a much more lucrative scheme.

    We set up a bank or loan company, and give everyone we can find a loan. It doesn't matter if they can pay it back or not.

    Then we go to the government and tell them our business plan has just had the arrse ripped out of it and we need money or the kids will have to miss out going to Eton this year.

    Hey presto we'll be rolling in money in no time.