arrse dragons den

#1
after the inspired spearmint hippo Idea bring you own dubious business ideas
to the dragoons.
my effort
I need £5000
to set up studentknickers.co.uk
business plan selling of used knickers worn by a selection of students at British fine and not so fine university's
 
#3
I was in Tokyo a few years ago and was told about vending machines that sold 'warm' secondhand ladies drawers but I did not see any. Bloody choked, went all over the place looking for one.
 
#4
It's a good idea & you may get many takers from the dirty mac brigade.
But sadly i think it's a non starter, so for this reason i'm out!

And studentknickers.com is already taken & has been since 2004!
 
#5
DRIVER_B_III_RASC said:
I was in Tokyo a few years ago and was told about vending machines that sold 'warm' secondhand ladies drawers but I did not see any. Bloody choked, went all over the place looking for one.
Oh, they exist... erm... so I'm told :oops: cough. cough...
 
#6
VMechA said:
DRIVER_B_III_RASC said:
I was in Tokyo a few years ago and was told about vending machines that sold 'warm' secondhand ladies drawers but I did not see any. Bloody choked, went all over the place looking for one.
Oh, they exist... erm... so I'm told :oops: cough. cough...
My brother is off to Japan in a couple of weeks so I can set him a research task...
 
#7
I would like £500 to start my own mail order Red Bahloon and Lollypop business, with special crayoning in order forms.
 
#8
I'll tell you where I'm at.

I don't think you have your numbers right and I don't think you have a good business plan. You can only market this to soldiers so I'm out!
 
#9
Donkey-Spanker said:
I need £100,000 for an independent beer rating project. Over the next 10 years I intend to visit every pub and brewery in countries known to produce good beer, sampling every variant to exhaustion. The findings will then be whittled down to one ultimate best beer, which I will write on the back of a fag packet. For a one-time payment, punters will be shown the fag packet and gain the knowledge of the ultimate beer.

For £200,000 I could tell you the best crisps to have with it.

Any takers?

Edited for beer typing, project already well underway!
I wouls also Like £100,000. This would help me launch project Munt hunt, I would travel the world as donkeys faithful sidekick banging munters from every country also producing a cracking 5 minute brief at the end.

I would also need a further £5 for condoms.
 
#14
Id like 250000 to start up a specialist walt hunting group. Using ARRSE as my intelligence network and using an elite group of mercenaries (also obtained through the arrse ranks). When we eliminate the walts their possessions and property will be sold off the proceeds going back into the company.

We currently have a list of 5 walts awaiting a visit

1. Baron Castleshort - for gaining false honours and being a member of L of F proberbly the most walt like organisation in the world, with the exception the ACF.
2. Gordon Brown - For walting it up pretending to be a prime minister who was elected by the people.
3. Sven - Obvious reasons
4. Graham Eckerman - claimed to be a super marine when in fact he was a catering worker and pedo
5. Ritchie C - To improve the UK's IQ by 10 points per person.

So is anyone in?
 
#15
I'd like like £100,000 to start up HiRE a Mong the plan is to rent them out to functions such as weddings and birthday parties/corporate functions/mess do's depending on the pacage the cleint ops for the mongs will act accordingly from dancing on the end of a chain/fight club drool experience/ /Mong sexual deviancy /fighting over laboons and ice cream. I predict this will be more popular than karaoke in cheap and nasty bars in Spain. And will return a 1000% net growth on your investment within 18 months.
 
#16
Donkey-Spanker said:
Nutter said:
Id like 250000 to start up a specialist walt hunting group.
Have you not heard of the Waltenkommando? Wait a minute, you're a walt! Burn him!
Yes but with this money the waltenkommando could be taken one step further.

Edited due to mongness
 
#17
Donkey,

Thats sounds like a winner as long as you promise not to have Syledis & Scaley involved that is,

And my plan for which I shall need the sum of £100,000 is to be the fitness DVD that goes along with your quest entitled "You to can have an right arm like this!"
 
#18
brettarider said:
I'd like like £100,000 to start up HiRE a Mong the plan is to rent them out to functions such as weddings and birthday parties/corporate functions/mess do's depending on the pacage the cleint ops for the mongs will act accordingly from dancing on the end of a chain/fight club drool experience/ /Mong sexual deviancy /fighting over laboons and ice cream. I predict this will be more popular than karaoke in cheap and nasty bars in Spain. And will return a 1000% net growth on your investment within 18 months.
That sounds bloody good to me.....

what about a good smacking of someone they dont like either how much would that cost or is it part of the Day/Night or 24hr fee. I've seen some mongs give out a good kicking at times.
 
#19
Donkey-Spanker said:
How much will you charge for a letter from General Sir Mike Jackson?
Everyone knows it's "General Sir Jackson", it was on The Letter.

Donkey-Spanker said:
Forget the beer survey. For £95,000 I will find the ultimate porn on the internet. I think we're looking at a 5 year timescale here... a single answer written on the back of a fag packet.
5 years? You'll be too blind by then to write on a barn door, let alone a fag packet.
 

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