ARRSE dictatorship - Cabinet

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by crabby, Jun 19, 2006.

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  1. Bring on the revolution.

    With the current government becoming more and more cnut like by the minute and the opposition parties offering less resistance than Dale's knicker elastic the time for the ARRSE coup is definitely upon us.

    While the COs may take all the gucci positions, like Prime Minister etc (loyally serving Her Majesty) what about all the other Cabinet members?

    I suggest MDN should be Minister for Health - He's caught just about every VD under the sun (and a few not) and will be in an empathetic position

    Flashy for Education - No more mongs

    Foreign Secretary - Who's the most vehement euro-sceptic and yank hater on here?

    Home Secretary - Putteesinmyhands as he'd hang every paedo, shoot every criminal and sell every asylum seeker for medical experiments

    Chancellor - Any takers? Could any arrser be trusted with the country's beer tokens? We've got loads of fat jocks on here, there must be one up for it.

    Environment - ?

    Defence - Has to be one of the COs...

    Culture - Shortfuse :D

    Transport - ?

    Northern Ireland - Has to be Mistersoft, the jokes every anniversary of the deaths of the Irish Sychronised Slimming team would be excellent morale

    Where is our "token" female going to go? They're all so fcuking useless though... :D

    So fellow arrsers, could you add to this cabinet reshuffle? Have I done a better job than Blair ever could? Any changes to be made?
  2. Auld-Yin

    Auld-Yin LE Reviewer Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    If Defence Secretary is to be one of the COs, then I suggest his deputy and Minister should be 5.56 for the experience and knowledge that he would bring to the position.
  3. Auld-Yin

    Auld-Yin LE Reviewer Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    Dept for Work and Pensions - Hackle
  4. I would like to vollunteer as FLASHY'S deputee or PA or sumit cos me spellin is propa good and the chavs would all learn loads and loads.
    i understand as a sprogy arrser i may only get brew boy duties, fair play.
  5. 5.56 for minister of armed forces he would lead them into battle with his trusty tactics of how to tie your boot laces.
  6. Yeaaaaahhh! 5.56 - son of Ingram!!!
  7. 5.56mm does seem like a popluar choice, perhaps the CO should watch out in his second term as 5.56mm challenges him for leadership with his loyal band of supporters...
  8. Environment - Redrat. Although a relative newcomer, he is learning to be a tree surgen. Knowledge of Arboricultre ( tree surgary ) must be an advantage. (His spelling not mine).

    As a reward for prolific posting, doomandgloom could be rewarded with governorship of Rockall.
  9. I'll have transport. Give ME the power! :twisted: I'll sort this mess oot.
  10. You'll make a fine politician

  11. Oh please, let me be the environment minister.

    V8 Muscle Cars for everyone :eek:
  12. following my recent work experience, I put myself forward as housing minister, (or minister for increased national debt)

    We shall buy and build on city centre pedestrian precincts. Every ex soldier will be given a new house, 3 mins staggger from the centre of every town with a decent range of boozers for a crawl. Kebab and grumble shops will be the new commercial property portfolio and the profit of shares in dog meat and kleenex will fund our inexorable rise to world domination
  13. I can see no objections that for - infact you're welcome to a couple of large mansions (with no council tax), three jaguars and three truckloads of Ginsters pies
  14. Could I volunteer myself for Minister Without Portfolio? .......... it doesn't sound too much like hard work. And, what about you, Crabby? Lords' Chief Whip and Captain of the Gentlemen at Arms sounds fun!!!!

    There's lots to choose from:
  15. I'm just the bloke that cleans out the bogs...