Army Stories

#1
Hi yaall,

I have sent an email to this forums moderators for advice on asking the members of this forum to email me stories, below is exactly what I emailed a moderator

I am freelance writer and wish to conduct some research around the British Army's involvement in the current conflicts in Afghanistan & Iraq.

The information I am requiring is just general stories of life in the UK Army at its bases over in Afghanistan and Iraq.

I would like to ask your members if they would like to contribute to my research by emailing me stories on daily life in the bases and while on operations.

The stories I am interested in are humorous, amusing and light hearted. I am researching what soldiers do to cope with the situations they find themselves in whilst away from friends and their families.


The moderator explained I might get some stick by asking (",)

Thx Drew
 
#7
I have an amusing dit about a severed finger, a mans anus, a camera and Kajaki Dam as the background in a photo but I prefer my liberty....
 
#9
Once upon a time, there was a one eyed ogre, and he had a group of followers called, "the treehuggers" and with their help, he ruled the land like a tyrant.

Then one day, he met an idiot from a far away land, who suggested they join together and rid the world of nasty people.

So the one eyed ogre agreed, and sent all his soldiers off, to fight the nasty people.
Unfortunately, he didnt give them any weapons or equipment that were of any use, instead, he spent all his money on drop in centers free housing for the lazy and child benefits for children who didnt even live in his lands.

This made him look good to the world, but his own people suffered, well, those who worked for a living anyway.

So the soldiers went to fight the nasty people, but with the lack of support and funding from the ogre, spent all their time being killed, just to make him look good in the eyes of the idiot from the far away land.



Happily

Like most fairy stories, this one will also have a nice ending.


The only good thing is, it wont be for the one eyed ogre, you see, him and all his treehugging followers, will soon be gone, and the soldiers can come home and get the respect they deserve.

And we can all get back to being what we should be again.


The end
 
#10
slammer1912 said:
Hi yaall,

I have sent an email to this forums moderators for advice on asking the members of this forum to email me stories, below is exactly what I emailed a moderator

I am freelance writer and wish to conduct some research around the British Army's involvement in the current conflicts in Afghanistan & Iraq.

The information I am requiring is just general stories of life in the UK Army at its bases over in Afghanistan and Iraq.

I would like to ask your members if they would like to contribute to my research by emailing me stories on daily life in the bases and while on operations.

The stories I am interested in are humorous, amusing and light hearted. I am researching what soldiers do to cope with the situations they find themselves in whilst away from friends and their families.


The moderator explained I might get some stick by asking (",)

Thx Drew
To many the Army itself comprises their friends and family. If you haven't worked that one out yet then don't bother reporting on it.
Wonker :roll:
 
#11
And ALL the monies made from such a venture would go to charity - NO????........THOUGHT NOT!!!!

Either - get a proper job (where you do the work yourself) or join!!!
 
#12
top_soldier said:
And ALL the monies made from such a venture would go to charity - NO????........THOUGHT NOT!!!!

Either - get a proper job (where you do the work yourself) or join!!!
I have stories already written but the work is not yet published. I have included four accounts from when I served. If anyone would like to have their stories included just email me. A proportion of any royalties is going to the charity Help for Heroes www.helpforheroes.org.uk

thx Drew
 
#13
slammer1912 said:
top_soldier said:
And ALL the monies made from such a venture would go to charity - NO????........THOUGHT NOT!!!!

Either - get a proper job (where you do the work yourself) or join!!!
I have stories already written but the work is not yet published. I have included four accounts from when I served. If anyone would like to have their stories included just email me. A proportion of any royalties is going to the charity Help for Heroes www.helpforheroes.org.uk

thx Drew
Blimey, good job you put the link up for that H4H charity as none of us had heard of it till you told us.

Tit
 
#14
slammer1912 said:
top_soldier said:
And ALL the monies made from such a venture would go to charity - NO????........THOUGHT NOT!!!!

Either - get a proper job (where you do the work yourself) or join!!!
I have stories already written but the work is not yet published. I have included four accounts from when I served. If anyone would like to have their stories included just email me. A proportion of any royalties is going to the charity Help for Heroes www.helpforheroes.org.uk

thx Drew
You don't get it do you!!!!

None of us want to help because our stories belong to us, personally I would rather stick sharp pins in my eyes than put bread on your table - and yes I do have stories...........24 years of them (and still serving). Run away and hide you little journo baggage, and leave H4H to those of us who don't want to make a fast buck!!!
 
#16
Here is a short story from a personal account of Iraq.

I was sent to Shaibah and attached to the regs. Whilst there shorts were issued. I then had to sort them out into sizes and then put them into black bags for the various troops.

Looking at the sizes of shorts delivered, I saw that they would not match the sizes of those requested.

Rather than have 80% of people with no shorts, I decided that it would be better to have 100% with shorts, although they would be 2” larger in the waist than required.

I clearly annotated the required size sheet to reflect this and all black bags were clearly marked, SHQ, 1Tp etc.

The shorts were delivered to my unit where a Sgt was to issue them.
Up walks Spr A who had requested a 34” waist, but best I could do for him was a 36”. Totally ignoring the attached sheet of sizes he rummaged in the bag and pulled out a pair of 34” shorts which were intended for Spr F who wanted a 32”.

Very quickly it was a scene of chaos and the Sgt i/c decided that I had made a pigs ear of it and decided to open the other bags.

And so it was that a very small percentage of us were able to wear shorts.
 

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