Army / Corps slang

I, and I make no apology for this, am an ex groundie who remained drunk for most of my nearly 9 year career bouncing around the different Squadrons of 3 and 4 reg between 88 and 96.

During a conversation with another ex groundie (who later went on to become green slime and then a vastly overpaid civvy consultant, enough to make a senior QHI jealous!), we came onto the subject of Army / Corps slang. Several yellow handbags later (he had kindly decided to bring them back from his last visit to Kraut land), we had come up with quite a good list, which I can't remember. So, I am going to start a list on here (based on what I can remember) and I would appreciate it if you good people would add to it.

This is purely for alcohol related reminiscing purposes and should in no way breach the Official Secrets Act


1. REMF   Rear Echelon (how do you spell that?!) Mother F*****

2. BAT    Bast*** Air Tech

3. Dobie   Washing

4. Dobie Dust   Washing Powder

5. Minging  Dirty, like a scouser

5. Bop  NAAFI do for pulling tarts

6. Smudge   SMG

7. Gimpy  GPMG

8. Floppy   Gazelle

9. Jockey   Overpaid aircrew type

10. Fat Boy   Lynx Jockey

11. Rodney   Sandhurst type

12. Wobbly   Warsteiner

13. Yellow Handbag   Handy Dortmunder Pils 6 pack

14. PONTI   Person of no tactical importance (Mr Bean)

15. Mine sweep  Relieving the unobservant of their drinks

16. Greenie   Some type of BAT

17. Blackie   Another type of BAT

18. TRATS   Three Regt Anti Trapping Squad, a group of particularly inebriated groundies and BATS who would make it their duty to ensure that none of their colleagues would pull a bird whilst at the local bop. Tactics would include being sick on said bird, kissing the hopeful suitor etc.

19. Green Slime   Int Corps

20. Muppets   NISS

21. Hereford Hooligans   SAS

22.  Colonel   NAAFI as in Gadaffi

23. Bennies   Falkland Islanders

24. Stills   Falkland Islanders after SO's banned the term Bennies, as in "Still a Bennie"

25. Chogies (another doubtful spelling)   Arabs

26. Yomp   a thing PTI's like to do

27. Gun Bunny   RA

28. Slop Jockey   ACC

29. Scran   Delicacies prepared by a slop jockey

30. Growler   Any NAAFI food, usually pies

31. The Dam   A place where I or none of my colleagues ever went to procure illegal marijuana type substances.

32. Razman   RSM

33. NAAFI tart   any female employee of the NAAFI

34. Moose   a particularly unattractive female, normally found at Bops.

35. Box Heads   Krauts

36. Karton Kompf   German translation of above

37. GCP   German civvy police

38. IED, RCIED   self explanatory

39. Dickers   found in NI, dicking their provo mates in the nether regions

40. Player   the recipient of the above

41. Crabs   RAF

42. Fish heads   RN

43. Boss   The CO, my recollection was Col Hewittson, the other guy that totally shagged the regiment up and then Col Parker (anyone that remembers the middle guys name, let me know)

44. QH1   QHI

45. Stolly   Stalwart

46. Marsden   Horrible building where MT used to be

47. Steam REME   unwashed mechanical type

48. Screws mess   The old JNCO's open all hours bar

49. Salamanca Kaserne   The last words uttered to a Box Head taxi driver before passing out.

50. Stag On   Something that I am so glad that I do not have to do anymore!

I have reached 50 and my brain hurts, any further additions will be greatly appreciated.

The force is strong with this old wise one, Obiwan!  We are obviously of a similar vintage, as I was at Minden, Hildesheim and later Gutersloh over the same years.

Small correction - the 'Yellow Handbag' of my callow youth was HERFORDER PILS, not Dortmunder.  Germans of my acquaint referred to DAB (Dortmunder Aktien Brauerei) as Deutscher Arbeiters Bier - German Working-mans beer.

How about some of the 'Squaddy deutsch' of that era - you recall, we would simply translate english idiom quite literally into german...

1.  Deutsche Dose                   -       Jerry can.
2.  Drei stuck bon-bon             -       Three-piece suite.
3.  Zwei rechts burgermeister -       Too right squire.
4.  Die alte forelle                    -       The old trout.
5.  Kartoffel tschuss                -        Tattie-bye.
6.  Auto schlussel hosen         -        Khaki trousers

...and there must be many more!
Schitten Halten          Windscreen

Schitten Schiften        Windscreen Wiper

Schtoppenheddenbangenmachen       Seatbelt
.Two stick in my mind:

Ich habe nur ein halbe panzer links:   I've only got half a tank left.

SHABWAH:   Shiny Arsed Base Wallah...............

......but what a brilliant thread.    I shall rack the old and addled brains 'cos I know that there are more in there. ;D.
My two favourites are:

Alles uber die platz           All over the place


Fick meine alten gestiefel       F*** my old boots
And I stand corrected; it was indeed Herforder Pils that was the yellow handbag. DAB was that stuff that you could get in those massive 5 litre (seemed like it anyway) cans that you would then attempt to: -

51. Shotgun    A way of drinking beer which would consist of the following and result in extreme drunkenness (and usually, in my case, getting bust again)

a. Pierce the bottom of the can with a sharp implement (the handy leatherman)
b. Attempt to suck the beer out of the can through the newly created hole
c. When you can suck no more, pull the ring on the can, which would release the remaining beer faster than a Dental Technician could run from a fight.
d. Attempt to drink the said remaining beer
e. Be sick
f. Accept the applause from your assembled colleagues.
g. Fall over
.............and to continue the thread, can anyone complete the following song:

Was costen das hunde in die fenster (apols for spelling!), ie "How much is that doggy in the window?"
ich hab ganz viel zenf in mein kurz lederhosen - i have a lot of mustard in my short leather, that doesn't make sense does it
Bundespost Pat, Bundespost Pat
Bundespost Pat mit der schwarz und weiss chatz.
Erlie bis dem morgen

Then I lose it but you get the idea....
Here’s a few more that people have been kind enough to email to me. A few of these bought back some memories!

52. TEWT   Tactical Exercise Without Troops! (Only in the Army)

53.  Big sun   Nuke, should have been sent to saddam last time, would have prevented the need to sort him out again!

54.  Velcro stripes   Rank awarded to a person that deserved it, but was almost certain to lose it within 12 months (i.e. me!)

55.  Tea and biscuits   The nice meeting with the CO when he gives you your Velcro Stripes

56.  No tea and biscuits   The direct opposite to the above

57.  SPROG, NIG   unsure of the SPROG acronym, NIG was New In Germany. A person of questionable experience.

58. Sweat   Not a SPROG or a NIG

59.  Comfy Bum   The none issue toilet paper that the old sweats would take on exercise.

60.  Rat Pack   A form of biological warfare used by the British against the British Army. Came in a silly cardboard box with a range finder on the back that no one ever used.

61.  Cheese Possessed    Processed Cheese in a can found in Rat Packs. Good for midnight drunken snacks or throwing at NIG's.

62.  Babies Heads   Alleged steak and kidney pie, found in a Rat Pack

63.  Train Crash   Jam roly poly, found in Rat Pack

64.  Noddy Suit   NBC suit designed to make all that wear it feel like shit. Specially designed to make it impossible to perform any bodily function without leaving the results of that bodily function secreted upon the tapes that hold the trousers up.

65. Mark I Eyeball   The most reliable piece of surveillance equipment on offer to HM Forces. Often proven by a Junior NCO to be more reliable than the Op's Officers intel.

66. Spam   Spastic Plastic American Motherf****r. Our Yank colleagues

67. TUAAM   Some piece of Sigs equipment that no one in our Sigs Det could ever figure out

68. Brew   The soldiers answer to all ills. If all around were falling apart, a "brew up" would cure everything.

69. Brownie Points.   Things that the career minded who had no actual job related skills would attempt to obtain from Rodneys by putting up particularly tasteful Christmas Decorations etc.

70. LPCs   Leather Personnel Carriers - boots

71. Bikini   The thing that Swedish birds in Cyprus used to wear very little of. Alternatively, the thing you dreaded if it went to Bikini Red. Not because you are worried of an attack, but because you have to leave the NAAFI, get out of your civvies and Stag On.

72. Doss Bag   Sleeping bag

73. Schlaff Sack   Kraut translation of above

74.  Green Maggot   As above

75. Thunderflashes  Excellent things to steal from exercises and throw at Sprogs, NIG's and civvies. Also excellent for inserting (once lit) into a rolled up, old style (feather filled) Doss Bag.

76.  FIBUA  an excellent excuse when on any promotional course to throw Thunderflashes at SPROGS, REMFS and NIG's.

77. REMANTLED   An expression that I had forgotten long ago. Comes from the intellectually challenged SSM of 654 Sqn during Op Granby (the one that got injured during an "accidental" RTA and was sent home, Danny something. I was there and still can't remember his name!). He made a statement that he wanted all of the weapons dismantled in one place and REMANTLED in another.

Why oh why did we ever feel that we needed to import  groundcrew SNCO's from other arms without even making them take the basic recruit intelligence test?!

78. ALLIGATORS   Another expression from the above named SSM. A parade one-day during Granby concluded with the statement that he had "heard that people were making allegations against him" He turned his back and said that he wanted "all of the ALLIGATORS to take one step forward"!

Hence, the 654 Sqn "Zap" sticker from Op Granby. "Desert Alligators, we can Remantle Kuwait"

I was also sent a story concerning our ever vigilant and attentive American friends that, although it has nothing to do with the thread, deserves airing.

This story perfectly illustrates why, during Op Granby, we were more scared of the Americans killing us than we were of the iraqi's.

This is the transcript of the actual radio conversation of a US Naval ship and the Canadians, off the coast of Newfoundland, in October 1995. The transcript was released by the Chief of Naval Operations 10th October 1995.

CANADIANS: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the South, to avoid a collision.

YANKS: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the North, to avoid a collision.

CANADIANS: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

YANKS: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert your course.

CANADIANS: Negative. I say again, You will have to divert your course.

YANKS: This is the aircraft carrier USS Lincoln, the second largest ship in the United States Atlantic Fleet. We are accompanied by three destroyers, three cruisers and numerous support vessels. I demand that you change your course 15 degrees North, I say again, 15 degrees North, or countermeasures will be undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship.

CANADIANS: We are a lighthouse. Your call.

And they wonder why we painted "F**K OFF, WE'RE BRITISH" in massive letters on the top of our bowser!
Warum Augen Herren.............Why eye man
Ein messe polizie..........Fair cop

Screech.........lovely fruity drink

Harry black....tape bonding corps together
gorilla snot....rub it on your road springs etc
lumpy jumper / split arse etc


einen Spitzenbangensmokentuben.......exhaust pipe.
The guys name was Danny Walker, 654 SSM, his other priceless saying were as follows;
' I want 4 men on guard around this berm, 2 on the outer rimeter, and 2 on the inner remiter'
' You three are a pair of cu*^s'
Another of his now famous quotes was when we were sat there one night chillling out, an MLRS started firing on the horizon. He came out from his CVRT and said ' Who the f*%k is firing schermulies this time of night. Priceless.
Finally, frank bough- scoff
           frankie vaughn- porn
What about:

FUB: Fat Useless B*****D
down the gregory peck: Down the neck/scoff
All in: Stew
Shiney Ar*e: Clerk
10 Mark Alley: ????????
Mincer: Geezers from Minden
Active Edge: off to war with the commies!!!
FFR: L/Rover fitted for radio
GS: L/Rover not fitted for radio
Gobsh1te: Mouthy
Seen: Visual: Tally etc
Tabs: Fags
Provo: Miserable git in guardroom!
SQ's Dog: Miserable git in stores!
Zero 4: The dreaded stores run to Detmold!
Seleton Order: Ammo pouches only!

Apologies if ive repeated any!


enuff said

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