Arkell v. Pressdram


Someone I know with no assets has just been threatened with being sued for libel.
It gave me great delight to draft the reply to the pillocks who thought they could threaten by quoting Arkell v. PressDram.
My day has been made & I deserve a beer!

Edit to make more anonymous, this thread is coming up on page 1 of google!
I just couldn't resist Googling Arkell v Pressdram, and I found this. Made oi smoile.

Solicitor (Goodman Derrick & Co.):
We act for Mr Arkell who is Retail Credit Manager of Granada TV Rental Ltd. His attention has been drawn to an article appearing in the issue of Private Eye dated 9th April 1971 on page 4. The statements made about Mr Arkell are entirely untrue and clearly highly defamatory. We are therefore instructed to require from you immediately your proposals for dealing with the matter. Mr Arkell's first concern is that there should be a full retraction at the earliest possible date in Private Eye and he will also want his costs paid. His attitude to damages will be governed by the nature of your reply.

Private Eye:
We acknowledge your letter of 29th April referring to Mr J. Arkell. We note that Mr Arkell's attitude to damages will be governed by the nature of our reply and would therefore be grateful if you would inform us what his attitude to damages would be, were he to learn that the nature of our reply is as follows: fuck off.
I'd love to see the look of bewilderment on the face of the Office Junior who opens that OB. I like your style, I myself am having a problem with a well known Energy Provider and you have given me the ideal reply to their less than helpful letter I received from them today.
That's a shame, I thought this refered to the Swindon brewery Arkells, jolly nice chaps wondered if the family might have some dodgy history I might exploit for financial gain.

Blackmail is such an ugly word, but so much quicker to say, and understand.

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