OK, I've got this mate who's got a big fek off parrot. He's trained it to abuse anyone who enters or leaves the room. When you go in, it asks: What do you want ******! When anyone leaves, it lift's a wing and says. Go on, **** off! The latter is ******* hilarious, because two if it's wing feathers extend into the perfect v-sign. But....... this morning whilst meandering down the Straße, I passes this ******* oink of a fat ******* spotty horror, who was having a proper conversation with her dog. Does anyone actually believe that.... a) The dog is listening. b) The dog understands. c) If the dog was listening or understood... that it would give a flying **** about getting home before it rains. Wouldn't it be kinder to have the silly fat cnut put down and give the dog to 'Dogs Trust' where you can sponsor a dog and it'll write you a letter each month telling you what a dim **** you are!!! I feel better now. Time for nap.