Any tips for a new recruit?

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maninblack

LE
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#2
Keep your pants fastened when around students and always buy a drink in the mess for anyone over 40 (and forget about the fastened pants at that point as well)
 
#3
Use your common sense and check for similar threads that have been done before. :roll:

Oh wait. Potential Officer.
 
#5
Even though you appear to be a girl if you drop 50p kick it to the door before you bend down to pick it up. In the event that you are female look forward to being hit on by varied PSI's Otherwise enjoy the experience. Forgot to add, in the event that you do indeed commission in due course look forward to people trying to play "Sh*g The Subbie" with you. :)
 
#7
Polishing your boots in the Mess bar while indulging in slammers is a sure way to impress.

Buy some green hairnets, but, for God's sake, make sure they're Army Green! (That's Olive Green to you).

Sew darts in your shirts. (Needlework term, not 501).

Make sure you've got women's trousers, men's trousers look stupid on a woman.

Make friends with somebody who can read a map.

Avoid driving, you'll only encourage them.
 
#11
hey,

work hard in the field, drink hard in the bar, screw lots before you get a girl/boyfriend - then spend all their money on gucci kit! Then transfer to Wales and do it properly ;-)
 
#12
Jeez, you don't know how true that was in CUOTC. If you were female that was.

maninblack said:
Keep your pants fastened when around students and always buy a drink in the mess for anyone over 40 (and forget about the fastened pants at that point as well)
 
#15
I hail from the land of Edinburger. What dost thou want to know. Everything said so far has been pretty spot on, especially avoid the RAMC subby. What wasn't said was the following.

If hot:
Constantly ask the coolest Juo for 'special help' (no not the SPECIAL special help) and flirt outrageously with him. When you see him in public, run up to him and give him a big hug, making all of his friends jeleaous. Share a basha with him on ex and then have exercise sex (sexercise). The best sex around (so i've heard). Then on return from ex, sex on the CO's desk. Then when he leaves, you will inherit his rankslide (the juo's not the co's, otherwise I'd be a LtCol) :)

If not:
Do not dare darken the door of the JUO office with your troll like features and fish based aroma. Consider it an honour if one of them looks at you without curling their top lip in distain.



Be generally happy, but not annoyingly, so and have an array of witty jokes to please people with.
 
#16
BigJobs said:
If hot:
Constantly ask the coolest Juo for 'special help' (no not the SPECIAL special help) and flirt outrageously with him. When you see him in public, run up to him and give him a big hug, making all of his friends jeleaous. Share a basha with him on ex and then have exercise sex (sexercise). The best sex around (so i've heard). Then on return from ex, sex on the CO's desk. Then when he leaves, you will inherit his rankslide (the juo's not the co's, otherwise I'd be a LtCol) :)
hold up, so you're a JUO and you actively encourage female O/Cdt's to throw themselves at you? my you are getting desperate in your old age?!
 
#18
Always ensure that you treat old comrades with the ultimate of respect and buy them loads of drink.
 
#19
There's nothing wrong with a bit of encouragment, not that they really need it. My girlfriend is starting to get a tad suspicious actually. It's considered bad form to flirt at functions when she's sitting next to you.
And I'm not chubby Herr Dok, I'm cuddly and festively plump.
 
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