Any good pranks?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by jest265, Jan 18, 2006.

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  1. OK I need some help,

    We have a bit of rivalry going with another Uni and like to pull pranks on each other.

    Up to now it hasn't been that amazing but quite funny, we have clingfilmed and tin folied their minibus, repainted their office, stolen various random objects and are about to kidnap a few of their members and drop them off all over the country.

    I need some help from you sick genius f*cks to think of something even better to pull on them. Preferably something original that but doesn't cause too much damage.

    Problems being that I cannot get any keys to their office, minibus or anything, as all staff have been warned that we're coming and will be trying to pull pranks. I will probably be watched at all times, for some reason they seem to think I am the ringleader :roll: .I am sure I will be able to lose them but probably not for long before they suspect I am up to something.
     
  2. Offer to make friends, take your rivals on the lash, get tanked up, double leg, get in the raw, fight with them, have it off with a prostitute.
     
  3. A famous prankster in the 30's used this one in Leicester Square.

    Found workmen digging road. Tells them a bunch of pranking students dressed as coppers will arrive shortly and try and arrest them. Rings local copshop (NOT 999) and tells THEM a bunch of students are digging up the road for a prank. Then records fireworks as two groups start punch up.

    This could be adapted to direct blame at your rivals. Most students dress like they have been digging the road up anyway, and most coppers look 16 years old (yes, I'm getting old).
    Problems though include wasting police time, and also whether cops actually turn up at all (busty arresting people who call their horses gay (see other threads)).
     
  4. At a certain US base in a certain country during the run up to Op TELIC 1, a 'rival (US) organisation' had an office next to our (British) office in a converted hanger. The offices all had suspended ceilings with a large walkway strung around the whole building. After a few pretty pants examples of pranks by them on us we decided to show them how to do it. The first endeavour involved removing the ceiling tiles in their office, and lifting the entire contents of the office out, through our office and set it up, perfectly, in the corridor and then replacing said ceiling tiles. Cue much bemusement and chuntering from the poor, confused Spams.

    The following week, after a little preparation, we managed to get lots and lots of balloons which we filled with polystyrene balls (from packaging) and blew them up with an air compressor. Now these offices were fairly small, but it still took a number of hours to completly fill the office to the ceiling. Much amusement from us the next morning when they unlocked the door to find it stuffed full of balloons. Even more so when they decided that the easiest way to get them out was by bursting them, thus releasing clouds of little white balls around their office!

    Well, we were bored and little things...etc
     
  5. Best I have heard of was a from a bunch of Young Farmers down home..........one of them gets married, to a horse probably, and goes on honeymoon..........while away enjoying the delights of Paris unbeknown to them at home a tractor is being dimantled by the rest of the YFC..........so they return to live life in wedded bliss only to find an example of John Deers finest has been rebuilt in the parlour!!
     
  6. I would suggest that you encourage your friends to visit a Northern English industrial city or a garrison town.

    Get them to simply wander about the place at chucking out time, entertaining the working class residents with their distinctive, university humour, whilst dolled up in crazy 'rag week' costumes.

    I can assure you that the results will be both spectacular and hilarious when reviewed later on CCTV or Booze Britain.
     
  7. Cable ties and gaffer tape. yeah
     
  8. Next time Crimewatch is on - call the number and report them as potential suspects. Had this done to me years ago, and when Police arrive at door you do crap it. Putting dead animals in thee bottom of their bergans always works, with the added bonus they are skanky students and probably won't notice the smell until full rot has set in. Seal their locker with silicone, then add water and cement and shake.
     
  9. You could take them to 'Scabs' aka The scorpion aka the catterick school of dancing.
    Honestly, a couple of razor sharp student anecdotes about stealing traffic cones and the hardships of a lecture will have the Toms in rapture. You could even ask some of the blokes staggering around the car park if they want a game of 'touch' rugby. However it may end up with you being hog tied in the block and your Khyber being 'touched' by the pen-one-fives of an entire platoon of HM's finest. Don't worry though, the modern soldier is very safety concious and they would not dream of going in dry. As with all physical activities, they will help you with some 'stretching exercises'. Gradual at first and then building up, from broom handle to thunderflash (possibly lit, depending of the level of innebriation), to bottle of dog (base first)
     
  10. Do a big turd in each of their boots. If they have trainers, poo in them them stick it in the microwave. mmmmmmmmmm.
     
  11. Put an advert in free ads asking for any unwanted animals and give the other Uni's address. Not only will they probably get lorry loads of unwanted bullocks & manky sheep but im sure the Animal Liberation front will show up thinking the uni is doing something nasty to its furrier friends!
     
  12. Invite them all round to your humble abode.

    Obviously the smell of cat food, pish, lonely man sperm, body odour and sadness will incapacitate a percentage of the geeki on entry.

    This matters not a jot, bags of aggression and a Little Devil kitchen knife should see you through to the next stage of the "prank"!

    Knife in hand, order the biggest and handiest bloke there to fellate in turn each of the remaining geeks. Feel free at this point to manipulate your old boy with the free hand. If big handy bloke bauks at having a man's clit in his gob .....STAB HIM! That's what the weapon is for you puff!

    Escalate the level of violence as you see fit until each man is drained of his Satan's Sunny Delight.

    Afterwards, share a bottle of Blue Nun, a joint and laugh at the sheer spectacle of some Uni students being raving Honchos.

    The very idea.....................
     
  13. if they own irons and indeed use them, empty the water and fill it up with urine
     
  14. Then get the Little Devil out and make them iron your kit.
     
  15. Get three sheep/chickens/livestock of choice and paint the numbers 1, 2 and 4 on them. Release them in halls on on campus...

    Alternatively, fill up double glazing with water and goldfish