Any clean African jokes (if there ever were any...) out there?

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Placebo

Guest
#1
Dear Arrsers,

Placebo Jr has geography presentation to give about Africa sometime on Wednesday of this week. He is thinking of opening with a joke. The urchins in the audience will be a mixture of both genders ranging around the ripe old age of 16 to 17. Anybody know any smilers that won't get him ostracized by the local school board?

I was thinking of recounting this old gem: Whats the the best thing about an Ethiopian blowjob? You know she will swallow.

Too bad his younger brother told me the joke so I suspect it's been around the neighborhood. But seriously, any good ones out there?

Sincerely,
Placebo
 
D

Deleted 20555

Guest
#3
Well I could come up with not exactly jokes but more like experiences - problem is no one ever believes them...
 
D

Davetheclown

Guest
#4
Dear Arrsers,

Placebo Jr has geography presentation to give about Africa sometime on Wednesday of this week. He is thinking of opening with a joke. The urchins in the audience will be a mixture of both genders ranging around the ripe old age of 16 to 17. Anybody know any smilers that won't get him ostracized by the local school board?

I was thinking of recounting this old gem: Whats the the best thing about an Ethiopian blowjob? You know she will swallow.

Too bad his younger brother told me the joke so I suspect it's been around the neighborhood. But seriously, any good ones out there?

Sincerely,
Placebo
four things that Africans lose there children to,

diesease

famine

HiV


Madonna
 
#6
There once was an African gent
of the homosexual bent
his buttocks were splayed
when he got laid
and left sperm wherever he went
 
#8
He could start with some simple facts.
1. Africans all have gigantic cocks.
2. All Africans are rapists.


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Remote possibility that might get him punished by the yoghurt-knitters, me-thinks.

How about:

1. Africans all have gigantic cocks.


...but their elephants are even larger.

...that way he can remain clean while still "having a giraffe".


Ah, that'll be my taxi.
 
#9
Zuma hires a 747 and drags the family off to Disneyland. While there he runs into Mickey Mouse who says to him "Hey! I know you. Look... I've even got a Jacob Zuma watch!"
 
D

Davetheclown

Guest
#11
I visited a pygmy tribe that lives in the long grass of the savannah, they are called wherethefuckarewe tribe!
 
#12
#13
Rastus goes to the witch doctor as he and mrs Rastus are having trouble concieving. Two hours later he returns wearing a top hat, tails, spats and a cane.
Whattin yous wearing all dat for shouts Mrs Rastus?
"Well the witch doctor says i is impotent so i thought i'd better dress impotent."





is that my coat ?
 
#15
Two guys on safari in Africa when a lion comes out of the tree line, one guys starts to put on a pair of trainers, his mate says "you will never out run that lion". I don't have to, I just have to out run you.....



is there room for me in that taxi??
 
#16
The Zambesi is in flood and full of hungry crocs. Three blokes want to cross from Zim into SA but the bridge has been washed away. First bloke strips down to his shorts, puts a knife between his teeth and dives in. Doesn't even make it ten yards before the crocs are on him like a Jack Russell on a fat rat. Second bloke decides to take along a machete and gets about twenty yards before the crocs are all over him. Third bloke thinks for a bit, roots around in his luggage and puts on a T-shirt he had in there. Gets in the water and starts swimming. The crocs swim up, take a look and swim away. Bloke reaches the SA bank and as he climbs out, a bystander who'd been watching all this strolls up and asks him how he did it. Bloke shows him the T-shirt which reads: England! Grand Slam Winners! and informs him that not even a hungry croc would swallow that one.
 
#17
A white BOSS and his BOY are walking across the savannah when a sink hole opens up and the Bosses "boy" falls into the depths.

White boss shouts down , "Sixpense , are you ok? , have you broken anything?"





"No Boss , I just got down here"
 
#18
Some random woman stopped me in the street today and started telling me a joke. It had all the ingredients of a good joke: child abuse; incestual rape; tears and suffering; but I didn't understand the punchline.
Something about £2 a month?
 
#19
An African is canoeing down the Congo singing "Eye zigger zigger zoomba zey" when he accidentally goes over a rapid. He's recovered with terrible head injuries and undergoes brain surgery where the surgeon has to remove half of his brain.

Two weeks later he's canoeing down the same stretch of the Congo singing "Eye zigger zigger zoomba zey" when he goes over the rapid again. Once more he's pulled from the river badly injured and rushed to hospital. More surgery follows and the surgeon has no choice but to remove the remainder of his brain.

Another two weeks pass and he's back in his canoe paddling down the Congo singing "Oh flower of Scotland ...."



Mines the viking hat in the corner and I don't need a taxi ... I have a canoe.
 
#20
Old ones....


Mugabe walks into the doc's surgery with a parrot on his head. Doc asks "Where did you get that?" Before Mugabe can speak, the parrot says "Africa! There are millions of the buggers there."


Mugabe walks into doc's surgery with a parrot on his head. Before he can speak, the parrot says "Can you help me doc? I've got something foul stuck to the bottom of my feet."
 

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